The harsh everyday life of an all-inclusive - 2
To be continued. Start here:
In the morning, the birthday girl woke up, as always, before anyone else and began to rustle exaggeratedly loudly. We didn't show that we were already awake. Then she loudly declared that it's time for us to go? I had to open the tired eyelids. The day before, we wanted to meet her DR together with sunrise on the beach. But the lazy girl said that dragging bottles, and at the same time our asses, to the beach was too tiring. Well, how can you refuse a birthday girl? We sat down on our likeness of a veranda (we lived on the first floor), slaughtered a melon that had been stolen the other day, and used two bottles of the stocked brutik for this work. We had a plate and a knife, we found them near our building. They were lying there dirty, and no one bothered to clean them up in two days. Well, well, here they come in handy.
It was still twilight, but people were already leaning on the beach, looking at us with surprise. And sho, and we are nothing! We drank peacefully and went to breakfast. Then to the beach. Then, having traditionally soaked a friend, they went on a long swim, longer than the previous one, but in the other direction. We sailed past Concorde, Hilton and Siwa. The mask shamelessly poisoned. I had to periodically stop and pour out the water together with the snot. I began to freeze. We saw the remains of a pontoon under the water and climbed out onto the deserted shore to warm ourselves. It was here that I regretted for the first time that I hadn't worn corals. The ground was so hard and prickly from small pebbles grown into it that even our barefoot feet could hardly stand it. But we are wondering, what's next? We walked a little along the coast. There were some, apparently private, villas on the mountain. And in the distance one could see some hotel with a lighthouse. We didn’t go there anymore, but went down to the water and, swimming, almost clinging to the belly, over the coral, dived back into the aquarium and buried it back. I constantly glanced to the left, would a shark swim out of the abyss? From this thought, goosebumps on my body were covered with goosebumps.
When we returned, I had water (or snot) pouring out of my nose for several more hours. The friend was seething both literally and figuratively. It’s good that our sunbeds were not far from the shower, and she cooled there periodically. We sailed for two hours. The effect of champagne was irretrievably lost. I had to urgently catch up with a beer. When I once again cooled off, slowly swimming next to the pontoon, a group of aunts with the words “look how tanned she is, let's ask her” asked me if I had been to Jerusalem, and was it too hard to go there? I said that, in fact, I had just arrived, but I had once been in Jerusalem, and it’s hard to go, but it’s necessary! But then another aunt swam up and said: “What are you talking about! Yes, there is an uncontrolled area there, but you will be sold into slavery, and you will work in a brothel until retirement! The aunts looked at each other in bewilderment, they were obviously not schoolgirls anyway. I laughed and climbed out of the water.
In principle, this day was no different from yesterday. The only thing that, having come to the room after dinner, they found on the coffee table a small cake wrapped in film, with a single candle : ))). They apparently didn't have enough money for fifty. Since the room was too dark, I had to carry him to the toilet to take pictures. After that, he was partially eaten, for the sake of decency, because we were already, to put it mildly, full.
Oh yes! Forgot about cleaning. On the first day, we did not leave the van dollar and threw green Christmas trees on the bed as a sign that we did not need to change the bed. I highly doubt they would change it, but just in case. So the cleaner took it in a completely strange way - he did not make the beds at all, but only took out the garbage. Okay, the next day they left the money, and the Christmas trees were not put on all the beds (for the purposes of the experiment). Covered everything.
The next morning, we managed to capture the sunrise over Tiran, as well as a stingray in shallow water and a herd of lionfish near the Hilton pontoon. The swim today was shorter, only an hour and a half, so that my friend would not meow. Cumulus clouds appeared from behind the hotel - I have never seen anything like this here! We haven't had enough rain yet! On TV they saw a running line that heavy rains are falling in the north of Egypt, a flood, a state of emergency has been declared, there are dead. Damn! How are we going to Jordan? But the clouds disappeared somewhere without a trace.
Before dinner, we left the hotel and went in the direction opposite to Soho. There were several shops, as well as two travel agencies! Here they are, it turns out hiding! Damn, but vdrg is cheaper there than we have already agreed? I won't survive this! So that I would no longer suffer, my dear went into one of them and asked the price for Petra. Came out satisfied, because here it cost $230.
Let's move on. On the way, some local man started a conversation with us, like - you have two wives, but I don’t, and I’m rich, I have camels and something else. And I, for fun, say: “Well, that's it, honey, bye! I’ll go with this man, he’s young and rich! ” and ran across the road with her arms wide open. Not running a little bit, she began to laugh and went back. The dude was not offended, but also laughed. He called us with him to Siwa, but we said that we were moving on. He was surprised, there, he says, there is nothing left! But we left. Then there was some kind of construction site or a dump, I don’t know. In the distance we could see a hotel with a lighthouse, which we did not reach. But the friend began to squeal: “Where are you rushing? The sun has already set, it will be dark soon. Don't look for adventure on your ass! " Okay, let's go back. But they said that if we were alone, we would have already climbed all the construction sites and garbage dumps. But it's probably good that we had a deterrent in her face.
Thursday was fish day! Just a holiday! On the site near the main restaurant grilled all sorts of sea stuff. And on the table laid out a still life of seafood. There were also tiger prawns, but we were not given them. Themselves, I suppose, gobbled up, bastards! Near all the braziers decent queues have accumulated. But the longest queue was, what do you think? When I saw it, I just passed out! FOR CHICKEN!!!!! ! Well people! However, there is no dispute about tastes. They probably just can't live without it. And I only eat wings, paws and offal in a chicken. I scooped up crabs, shells, which they, for some reason, call mussels, stewed with vegetables, either octopuses or cuttlefish, although the plate indicated that these were squids with shrimp : ))), and fried sardines.
It's time for everyone to try how delicious and tender crabs are!
The utter disappointment! Crabs, although of a decent size, turned out to be some kind of stunted. There was practically no meat in their claws, I'm already silent about the legs! The only place where meat could be found was under the shell at the base of the legs. Okay, let's try the "mussel". What they call mussels had only one similarity with the latter - it was a bivalve shell. Very small, and there was, accordingly, even less meat. There were no cuttlefish, but not the slightest hint of shrimp. The most delicious were fried breaded sardines, but they were with bones. I still managed to get enough, and, of course, I didn’t go for any chicken.
On the night from Thursday to Friday, at two o'clock, as agreed, a minibus called for us, which took us with several other passengers to a large bus. At the entrance we paid the guide $ 205, as agreed. We had a hard time finding empty seats, because some smart people took two seats. The bus was uncomfortable if the front back was lowered, the dear one had nowhere to put his legs at all. Luckily, there was a girl sitting in front of her in two seats, and she lowered only one of them. We were given migration cards, which we filled out on the go.
It took four hours to get to Taba. They stood for a long time, for some reason, in Dahab. Several more people were taken away in Taba. They were well-rested and fresh, unlike us. At six o'clock we arrived at the pier. We were given personalized tickets, on which the price was listed - $ 79. However! That is why such an expensive tour, more than twice as expensive as Jerusalem. We went through customs very quickly and boarded the ferry. While we were choking, all the places on the upper deck were occupied. I had to sit in an almost empty cabin, occasionally going upstairs to take pictures. We didn’t even order lunchboxes, mindful of their scarcity. We took pizza from lunch and water from the room. Plenty of water. It was given out half a liter a day per person, but we did not have time to drink it and we had a decent supply. Yes, and I didn’t want to eat something.
Sailed for 45 minutes. Then we went through customs for an hour, because there was only one computer, it took about a minute for each person, but there were a lot of people. We were among the first, so while we were waiting for the rest, we wandered around the Aqaba pier, looking at the yachts. One of them played a beautiful, but completely endless Arabic song. As long as we were there, she played so much. They sympathized with the owner of a cool car parked on the pier, plastered with crows. If they cheat, then the paint can peel off, there have been cases.
It was eight in the morning. It started to get hot, and we were dressed, on the advice of Larisa Orbitours, warm enough. Well, we think Larisa helped us. It's hot in here, what's the point of dressing like that? Three Poles were met by an individual Polish guide and a minibus. The rest were loaded into a large bus, better than the previous one. There were two guides, one for Russian-speakers, the other for English-speakers, including Chinese (or Koreans? Or Japanese? ) and a German who was lurking. While driving, the guides took turns telling something about the country. And, it seemed to me, different. I'm like that dog, in principle, I understand something in English. We were told mainly about the country as a whole, the population, the king and his wives. And the British, (referring mainly to a pot-bellied man, more like an Arab) about cars and their prices. Our guide also said that Jordan is one of the driest countries, but just yesterday there was a terrible downpour. That's where the cumulus clouds went! Aqaba, if I understand correctly, is a duty-free zone where people come to buy from all over the country. One solid dutik!
We drove for about an hour, all the time taking uphill. The relief is very interesting. And Bedouins rule everywhere. They built houses, but they still roam. I was amazed at how they manage to grow wheat on completely lifeless soil, and even harvest it by hand!
On the way, they brought me to some shop (how could it be without this? ). Leaving the bus, I shivered - it was very fresh, Larisa was right. As we were told, here the height is 1600 m above sea level. The shop had just cosmic (as it seemed to me) prices. There was Dead Sea cosmetics, rags and souvenirs, and a free toilet! I was only interested in the last point. Approaching the women's toilet, I met a man who came out of there, busily spraying air freshener. Yes!
Let's move on. Gradually, the panorama of Petra began to open. Beauty! We stopped at the observation deck to take a picture. The Chinese (or Koreans or Japanese) began to jump to get a photo in a jump, and they did it at the very edge. My heart almost stopped! Idiots! They seem to have been Japanese after all. Their eyes were suspiciously wide. They didn't do plastic surgery. Moreover, all three - two guys and a girl. And the girl was also a blonde (dyed, of course).
We drove through a city built by the Bedouins specifically for tourists, so that they would have a place to spend the night. About sixty hotels, including five. As we were told, Petra is exclusively their (Bedouin) business.
We've arrived! We were given entrance tickets (in my opinion, 50 dinars), but I still didn’t remember, in order to convert to dollars, do I need to divide or multiply by 1.5? In any case, it's not cheap. We saw how local well-dressed guys went through the turnstile for free, shaking hands with the guard. They probably have nowhere else to go. But first I had to go to the toilet. An Arab aunt-cleaning lady walked between the stalls, holding a roll of toilet paper in her hands, on which about a meter of the above-mentioned product remained, and then put it in one of the stalls, then took it again. In order to save money, probably.
And we went down the road of disappointment leading to the canyon. Why did I call her that? Yes, it's very cool! I would say - a mixture of the Colored Canyon, the Crimean cave cities and the Lycian tombs of Mira. If I had not seen any of the above, yes - I would have been at the capture (probably). Maybe I have already become such a spoiled Galya, maybe the crazy cost of the excursion played a role, or maybe the weather was just cloudy and the lighting was not right. I don't know, but I was a little disappointed. However, my companions liked everything. Only a friend is not used to walking so much. And the guide (bastard, I would say) said that the cost of the tour includes a ride on horseback the first 800 meters. I was delighted, not because I was too lazy to go (you know me), but because I would like to ride a horse. But the bastard guide continued the phrase - only the driver will need to give a tip - $ 5. Normal move! As we later managed to find out, this is not a tip at all - this is an ordinary dachshund. And in the booklet of Aneks it is written that riding horses costs $10! Here are the crumbs! And they want to warm up! And the guide also said that we would not reach the end - whoever wants to can sit on a wagon and drive further, and then they will be picked up by jeeps and taken to the bus. And it costs $30. Well finally! Lazy Yuga already wanted to stick to this proposition, but I said that we would not go. She alone did not want to go, saying that the donkeys in which the cart is harnessed must stink terribly.
Directly at the entrance to the canyon, another shop was waiting for us, which, according to the guide, was impossible not to enter. Well, they entered - pretty little things, dryuchki, figurines, plates. But I save! Enough, and so much money wasted on this trip!
We entered the canyon, and every minute dodging the passing wagons and headless riders, began to click everything in a row, half listening to the guide. Beauty all the same! Despite the huge traffic, it was clean in the canyon, because there were a lot of trash cans, and there were also cleaners. At first I mistook them for beggars, but I saw their production tools - a brush and a scoop, probably to clean horse-donkey-camel shit. In one place, the remains of the Roman road were wet - they probably also wash the floors.
The guide showed us a rock that looks like a fish from one angle and an elephant from another. Then, after a hundred or two meters, he again began to show us something, we didn’t see anything, he ordered us to move back a few meters and again showed something. Again, we didn't see anything. Then he said that, in fact, there is nothing there, but you need to turn around. We turned around - and ah! Here it is, the famous treasury, depicted on all the booklets, and filmed in the film about Indiana Jones!
I'm tired, I'll finish it later.
