Отзыв об отеле Krini. Review of Krini Hotel.

Today we returned from Krini. Since, since the Glorious Years of Stagnation, I had a chance to travel to different hotels in the Union and Europe, that is, with something to compare, I have seen everyone! So Krini evoked memories of non-intrusive Soviet service.
The hotel positions itself as a four-star hotel, apparently due to the first line, but this is far from being true. Since the island has a very rugged terrain, only five-star hotels can be profitable already on the second line. But even three stars for Krini is misleading the consumer, and you can easily write a complaint to the local tourist police (which, by the way, the locals are afraid of like fire). The hotel has recently changed hands, but the new owner does nothing to improve the experience of his hotel.
The rooms are spacious, the views from the windows are uneven, the best of the bungalows on the second floors, closer to the sea. The rooms have kitchens with stoves and ovens that, when turned on, stink like all the previous guests have fried fish on them. At night, the smell from the sewer enters the room if you do not plug the sinks and the bathtub with rubber stoppers and do not turn on the ventilation in the bathroom. If you try to sleep with the windows open, then depending on the location of the room, at night you will get either the noise of cars and motorcycles from the federal highway passing nearby or the smell from the same sewer, but mosquitoes and flies will still fly in, and huge nasty cockroaches. Therefore, advice: if you want to sleep peacefully, close the balcony door or blinds at night and turn on the air conditioner at 28-29 degrees at the lowest power, while standing on a chair and adjust the air inlet valve to the middle position, otherwise it will inflate your head! When the air condo is blowing, the mosquitoes do not pester.

Linen was changed three times in ten days, towels - only if they were thrown on the floor, but this is how it is in Greece! Although once the cunning maid hung the towels picked up from the floor not on hangers, no, because they were broken, but on a chair that we dragged into the bathroom. Burnt out light bulbs were quickly replaced. Instead of the lost coverlet, which the valiant maid, as it turned out later, put in a locker without a handle, which was under a non-working TV, the evening porter boy brought two blankets (ta paploma - Greek), although we demanded only "and kuverta" (bedspreads). In English, the porters understand poorly, unlike the girl, who was very kind and tried to help and please in everything, at least in what was in her modest powers.
In general, the best friend of Russians is a simple Greek, if he is not the boss. The Greek chiefs have only "Eureka" in their eyes, as Russian silver stood a thousand years ago. Therefore, advice: do not hesitate to take a phrasebook with you and at least use it to try to communicate with the Greeks. The older generation often doesn't speak any foreign languages, but they really like it when you try to speak Greek. They will always help correct pronunciation, prompt, show the way and in the end you will understand each other. And if you say that you are "orthodox" = Orthodox, you will be best friends, they will always give you a discount, or even treat you for free.
Greek bosses are creatures of a different kind. This is especially noticeable among the managers of the Krini hotel. A characteristic feature of the Greek hotel management are narrow rectangular glasses and often disregard for the guests. This is not the case in all hotels, for example, in Maravel Land Hotel, Maravel Sky Hotel and Alianthos Beach Hotel, where we visited our friends and for the purpose of acquaintance, the picture is completely different, obviously because mostly Europeans live there and these hotels are labeled "Thomas Cook". And although these hotels have three stars, literally everything is an order of magnitude better than in Krini.
It is clear that there are serious management problems at Krini. And this is reflected primarily in tourists. The hotel is mainly oriented towards Russians, as Western tourists can cause too much trouble for the management. And the Russian tourist, for the most part, behaves like a "people" who "hawks" everything that is slipped to him. Hence the inconvenient schedule of breakfasts, lunches and dinners, in other hotels their duration is half an hour or an hour longer, and tasteless food, do-it-yourself salads, diluted juices and terrible sherry, have already been mentioned more than once, but underbaked potatoes like "Pseudo-Idaho" for breakfast , this is one of the highest achievements, as the new chefs say! And also Dutch rubber tomatoes, green tasteless melons, immature watermelons, small horse mackerel, similar to sprats, but terribly bony.

And, finally, the highest achievement of four thousand years of Greek cooking is, of course, a three-day absence of olives! This is in Greece, where for centuries they ate olives and dry wine! When I asked why there is a complete absence of them, the answer was amazing: "And the heavy trucks are on strike, so the olives are not delivered to us! " In the neighboring hotels in which we were visiting, no trucks were on strike!
Now I will explain why we went there, although we had an idea Where we were actually going. We had a tough time pressure on the number of days and on the days of arrival. In those three days in which we could take off without problems, it was possible to fly away only with the Pegasus. Since we wanted to go to Crete for a long time, we didn’t have to choose.
In conclusion, I would like to turn to the owner of the hotel, although it is unlikely that he will read this in Russian (then we will write to him in English and Greek). We recommend a complete change of management, even if they are your relatives. It is better to pay one worthy professional who knows that you can put a three-cent perfume in the sewer, that guests can be allergic to cats, that insects in the hotel can be eradicated, that the chef should be the property of the hotel, and the bartender should be his face, and then people will be to return to you with pleasure and this is called a "good reputation", which, as you know, has been so appreciated for more than a century, for example, "Thomas Cook"!