THE MOST INTERESTING PLACE IN ISRAEL (what Ben-Gurion's Sat is looking for in the back aisles of tourists
THE MOST INTERESTING PLACE IN ISRAEL
(what SB Ben Gurion is looking for in the back passages of tourists)
. . . The country of Israel is perhaps the most not deprived Country in the world in terms of History. But, since Israel, according to the consent of all the world's sages, is a mystical place, it is not surprising that the discovery of interesting places is still happening...
Everyone knows for himself where for him to be the most interesting and mystical place in the world. The most interesting and mystical place in Israel, in my opinion, is Ben Gurion Airport in the capital of Tel Aviv. I made this discovery having the experience of multiple crossings of the state border in this unique place. Summarizing the experience and not being a citizen of the country, claiming to be called an "outside observer", I put together a picture that reflects a very interesting part of modern Israel.
The most mystical and mysterious structure operating according to mystical and mysterious laws in this mystical and mysterious place is the airport security service.
I want to immediately communicate my boundless respect for the Great People in general and the State of Israel in particular and perceive my opus as a fantasy told about a friend in his presence, the presence of friends and a fair amount of beer. So.
We must understand that in general, Israel is not Israel. Israel is America. And not just America, but also New York. How to understand? Judge for yourself. . . The State of Israel is a young State. But the State! ! Finally, the time has come when this fact has become so obvious and boring that the word "state" in front of its name began to look strange from the point of view of the modern generation. Let me suggest that the people of the Generation Who Gave His Life for the fact that Israel would be called the State wanted exactly this. So that this fact would be so OBVIOUS that it would cause a complete lack of interest on the part of others and an epidemic of total yawning. And we must admit that they completed their task by 100%. And respectfully take off your hat. Move on. . .
Israel has a Face. The face of Israel is the face of the whole world in miniature. The country gathered people from all over the world. The richness of genes per unit area is amazing. And it is Ben Gurion Airport that is the showcase of this fantastic country. Sabra! Here is the real face of the country, which no longer needs the prefix “state”. The young generation of people born and raised in the amazing country of Israel, or in short - "sabras". If I'm not mistaken, sabra is a plant with a fruit of amazing taste but with terrible thorns on the outside. Here are the Israelis, especially the younger generation is the same. At first glance, prickly and unfriendly. But in reality, they are ready to give their lives for you. And it all has to do with our most interesting place in Israel. Understand a little later.
The army in Israel is a “state within a state”. The moral authority of the Army is so high that it is almost non-negotiable. There are a huge number of different forces in Israeli society. Religious, financial, political, social. Reflecting sometimes directly diametrical views and judgments. The Army is the "watchdog" of the Society. And a connecting element for all forces in the face of real or imaginary danger. Besides, the Army is a great business. Some "drones" (combat unmanned aircraft) are worth something. All this led to the fact that the Army in Israel is "the first after God. " The level of tolerance towards the military and their actions on the part of society is very high. AND!
It is the Army that guards Ben Gurion Airport.
You need to understand what Ben Gurion Airport is for Israelis. He is the only one in the country. It is located in the capital of the besieged (it is not clear by whom) State. He is a symbol and a fortress. He is our everything! Mental Condensation of the Age-old Wisdom of the Jewish People! Joke. . .
Blowing up Ben Gurion Airport is the only, all-encompassing and soul-burning blue age-old dream of any Muslim and Palestinian. Giving your life in the fight to save the airport-aircraft-passengers is the main life goal of thousands and thousands of young Israelis.
When I was a boy in the Soviet Union, the paranoia of the Cold War reached the point that one day one of the frightened children at night wrote on the wall of the school "PEACE-PEACE, WE DON'T LET THE SCHOOL BLOW UP! " Can you imagine the state of this child? Something similar, in my opinion, is happening in my beloved Israel.
But excuse me, gentlemen, if everyone catches virtual terrorists, who will make “drones” in 10-20 years? Chinese. Well, okay... Let's move on.
Thanks to the success of Hollywood blockbusters, a whole generation of people has grown up motivated to fight the "Hollywood-terrorist" threat. I deeply respect the readiness of these people for self-sacrifice. But why hand over control of foreign tourists to soldiers? Why open the country, introduce a visa-free regime, and then arrange such “shows”? But the airport is a showcase of the State. A state that took place thanks to the feat of generations. Why did it take place? What would humiliate tourists? I doubt. . .
So: On the one hand, there is a technological, morally motivated, most powerful Army of the Middle East; on the other hand, there are civilian foreign tourists. Very funny situation right? From the point of view of young armed men especially! This is where the ground for unpretentious army humor arises. After all, it’s fun to shake the pads out of the bag from the “crap with fear” tourist, scatter them around the airport, and then stealthily shoot on her mobile phone as she collects them! How cool to watch it later and neigh with "comrades in arms" over a mug of beer... True, the State looks wild at the same time. After all, the Army is a state institution?
And tourists get a false idea about the country. Well, for example, people may have the wrong feeling that Israel is a third world country. I think that the Arab street would very much welcome this fact. So the question arises: who benefits from what is happening with tourists in Ben Gurion?
The show starts at the entrance. A "warrior" armed with an M-16, ready to riddle a driver-tourist-terrorist at close range, victoriously demonstrates the final victory of the Great State over potential-terrorist tourists. I advise: replace the M-16 with a flamethrower (grenade launcher). Burning the fuse (it looks especially spectacular at night) and the threat of burning alive will cause paranoid panic among terrorist tourists and the immediate rejection of all "insidious tourist plans. " The visual effect to which the "wise commanders" were so striving will increase significantly. Accordingly, the number of "endless attacks" of tourist-terrorists on the airport will drop sharply. . .
The main enemy of the Army at the airport is, of course, lone tourists. There is an internal very clearly traceable instruction in the security service regarding singles. Turn inside out! A loner is a potential terrorist who has nothing to lose. A loner is a potential prostitute who came to work. A loner is a potential guest worker who is about to take a job from an Israeli. And also a loner - a disenfranchised "non-citizen" for whom there is no one to stand up for. A defenseless man whose only fault is that he is alone. Such is the unpretentious military installation. Loners are examined with special predilection. Addictions are governed by common sense and the sexual orientation and inclinations of the examiner. Where have we seen this before. . .
Main show! The wise military command recruited girls from MTV into the airport screening service. Particular attention was paid to external data, and not to experience with people. Therefore, awesome, beautiful, young, magnificent, but “not disfigured by excessive intelligence” and experience, young people work in the pre-screening service! They are cheerful and young! And they are cool! But stupid frightened tourists do not perceive this as youth fun. People get scared. Probably funny. But wild. . .
Stupid tourists!
“Interns from MTV” ask tourist-terrorists “strange” questions, clinging to words. They raise their voice. Demonstrate weapons. Other "tourist fighters" put on handcuffs. Locked up in a cell. Taken off the flight. Take away cameras and laptops! They strip naked. Feel the genitals. Stick your fingers in your anus. They stick a tube down their throats. They check.
I explain to "stupid tourists" why this is necessary...
Explosives or flammable liquid can be hidden on the body to blow up or set fire to the aircraft. You can also pour liquid explosives into a condom and hide in the anus, then get it out and blow up the plane. You can swallow balls with explosives FART! ! in the toilet and again - blow up the plane. Therefore, singles have been turned inside out and will continue to be turned inside out. But if you are flying as a couple, in a group or with children - then please - blow up the plane. There are no or fewer checks. . .
Reminds me of a joke about a drunk who was looking for keys not where he lost them, but where there was a lantern and it was brighter. Airport security knows exactly what terrorists look like:
1. This is a loner.
2. In camouflage pants.
3. With Chegevara on the chest.
4. With a shaved head, a beard, a fanatical gleam in his eyes and explosives in his ass.
5. With a large camera and a laptop.
I have checked it several times! I'm going in camouflage pants - they will stop. I go in torn jeans, no questions asked. Haven't shaved in two weeks - come here. The muzzle shines - no questions. Complete predictability! As an instruction on terror. . . A real spy understands me perfectly. Bypassing "such" security service sharpened by "downs" is very easy. Here in Russia they talk about such: Kindergarten. Clown show. He served two years. Understand. That's a shame for colleagues. Why dishonor the Army? Why subject the suffering of disenfranchised tourists. Why dishonor the State? What did the Patriarchs fight for?
. . . Why are tourists humiliated?...
(Stupid tourists! You are not humiliated. You are provoked to detonate your bomb not on the plane, but right here and now. The fact that you do not have a bomb is your stupid tourist problem. We will humiliate and insult all single tourists in order to so that they detonate their bombs ahead of time. Because that's what the task of saving the planet looks like. All American Movies talk about it... )
Guys come back to Earth! You are in an illusion, you will end badly! . . Why are you preparing for a war with a hologram . . ?
It's easier to offend a tourist than a child. The child has rights. The tourist is nobody. All over the world, offending a guest who comes with peace and money is UNTHINKABLE! Even the Papuans don't do that. That is why tourists are worn in all civilized countries. A disenfranchised guest, guaranteed not to be armed, poorly oriented in the area. . . A person read about the Country, fantasized, thought about the beautiful, created an image, spent money earned by hard work. . . In order for the “servants of the State” to carry out an act on the border of reality and fantasy vandalism and desecration? Humiliation and insults? Trampled Human Dignity? Did you break the Crystal Image of a Wonderful Country? Stripped? Put in a humiliating position? Did you feel your genitals? Sticking your finger in your anus?
The tourist will not complain. No one. He will just go into a stupor. Experiencing shock. It's impossible to prepare for something like rape. What for?
The poison in the souls of offended people causes irreparable harm to the cause of the development of the State of Israel. And this is understood by smart people who run the country. But who needs to sow the seeds of discord between people . . ? Who needs. . .
And tourists bring billions of dollars in income to the host country.
But Israel, apparently, is a very, very rich country. . .
Be sure to visit Israel!!
Ivan Russian
