на пределе возможностей или ЖОР-1 at the limit of possibilities or ZHOR-1

Good day, wt. Tourists! We flew with UIA aircraft B 737-400. With 162 seats in the basic configuration, there were actually 170 of them, which somewhat complicated the life of tall passengers - sometimes the knees stuck in front of the seated passenger, giving him wild joy from an unexpected massage. Back, by the way, the board was of a similar model, but 167 people were seated much more comfortably. The flight was extremely dumb - somewhere on the way to Turkey they got into a zone of turbulence, such that the on-board food was knocked out of their hands . . Even the flight attendants began to smile too much, and this is a popular sign that a white polar fluffy animal was approaching. I even thought that the Ukrainian aircraft were already beginning to meet such sanctions... something had to be decided with Prisoner Yu... We went around the front somewhere closer to Alania and were already flying to Antalya a couple of shores. The host is PEGAS. Finally, the beer on the bus exceeded the cost of gasoline-3. $5 for 0.6L
The hotel greeted the Square of Three Stations with bustle. . . We splashed a cold drink and away we go. . . Thanks to the smart policy of PEGASA as a co-owner, the hotel was packed to capacity.... and it's not even at the beginning of the season properly! ! ! But, despite the overload of the hotel, we were 14 people who quickly settled everyone, and even took into account all personal wishes. Half went to the 8th building, and we took 3 rooms in bungalows on the 1st and 2nd floors. One room on the first overlooked pool 1601, but there was a depressingly damp-sour smell of either fungus in the air conditioner, or something sewer... the other two were normal. By the way, given the incredible uproar in the hotel, there is direct access to the center. the bass does not make sense - during the day -tyts-tyts-tyts, and in the evening - at night, solid relatively sober "bazaars" for life... I lived in 1615 - view of the fence with a neighboring hotel, but no staggering and extremely thoroughbred Mouzon from LE GARDINE. To say that the numbers somehow sunk into the soul, I won’t say... so ...
everything works, everything is cleaned, everything is clean, but there is no smell of designer delights. TV is represented by 6 or 7 Russian channels. The furniture is in decent condition, but there is one offensive nuance - the bed is equipped in the "base" with an ordinary sintepon stone, and a decent pillow can be ordered at the reception for $ 2 or 3 per day. Somehow a somewhat humiliating marketing ploy in the "five"... WI-FI in the rooms is paid... and in the lobby the load on the free Internet is such that you pull and pull, but you can’t pull it out, only in the morning you can skyip from the heart . In the room Internet 2 dollars per day. The refrigerator is replenished every day with 6 cans of cola and 2 mineral waters... although they sing on every corner, but it's nice, however... Housekeeping is stable, although I didn't pay anything, but I have no complaints either. Although, of course, when settling in 1601, shreds of black wool were noticed by friends, but maybe it was thought so, who knows now ? ! So we put a stable "four" for the number of rooms.

Now a few words about the territory. Everything is very reasonably built up - well, there is simply no meter of land that is not sharpened for some kind of project. Only one thing is somewhat depressing that there is more marble than greenery, and this already evokes thoughts about the brevity of life... find places. For some reason, the indoor bass was not heated, and one day it was very upsetting. The animators break the main one into sectors and amuse the well-fed audience in every possible way. The beach is clean and tidy. It is somewhat annoying that the entrance from the pier is from stainless steel, not upholstered with something rough and somehow slippery... Direct entry into the sea through medium pebbles... As usual, for some reason they did not bother to lay a paved path for the season, but in vain, after all, it’s not very comfortable to chop barefoot on the stones. This is not entirely clear - a lot of money was rolled up in marble, but there was no path.
And yet, a security guard with a baton walks over the beach, but on the pier, I never saw just a lifeguard... well, at least for the sake of decency. There was only one storm. of course, but still... let him stand somewhere in the shade, and don't take his eyes off our girls. At the beach, on a ledge, there is a bar. Drinks, coffee and beer... By the way, the beer that is poured on the beach is somewhat worse than the bass one, it kills people, it’s not beer .... The territory near the beach is occupied almost only for incessant feeding, but only a platform for sports basketball, a small area for the game of BOCH and in the shade an indoor pavilion for something feng shui-gymnastics, where flocks of women escape from wild gluttony in the hotel. And now the worst part - about the FOOD !!! ! ! It is impossible to call this gluttony food! ! ! This is the All-Union Feeding Center. Nikita Khrushchev. Not only is everything absolutely edible, but there is simply an incredible amount of it.
Only in the morning the meal takes place in relative silence, but the evening hamstering of 1500-2000 people just turns on... Well, how can you resist when the masses of the Slavic people absorb all sorts of goodies 3-5 times higher than the norm, drink an incredible amount of alcohol . . and all this under the boom-tsa-tsa of the Creole-soviet orchestra standing on the steps. Well, db so under 95-100 is dinner. Well, when, instead of the bourgeois BESSAME MUCHIO, they start playing Tender May, then everything slides down to a large rural PARTY. For a week stay at the hotel could not even 30-40 percent. try all the dishes .... well, it's impossible !!! ! ! I can’t help but point out one egregious case - it was on the 15th... I spanked for pasties for dinner, and there was blackening oil that was in the car after 100.000 runs in the summer. And that was at 20:12. . . that is, everyone danced minus 15-20 minutes on the carcinogenic substances. Returning to the room at 2053, the oil had already been changed, but to no avail ...
It always seemed to me that it was not the most happiness, it was gluttonous, but looking around. you understand that this little world was created according to the soviet laws of understanding happiness - Feed until it stops, drink until you lose your pulse, cheer and stretch tired guests by numbers. They created an exemplary hotel, in our understanding .... There is no gloss, chic and thoroughbredness there... this was especially manifested in the fact that no one bothered to pick up luggage at 0340 in the morning... It's just SUPER PARADISE in the concept of the average Slavic man in the street . And since there are only ours in the hotel, then this wedding of the chairman of the collective farm with sponsored money will never stop. It’s a sin to find fault with such excellent food, but even an overdose of high-quality kebabs can be sad - just reach your room to reach your gorged carcass and have enough strength... and at the beginning of the rest I made plans to climb the neighboring hill . . swim 2-3 km a day. What is it... we rolled from restaurant to restaurant and that's it.

And, it seems, no one forced it, but the atmosphere itself, when the crunch of bones is heard from behind each table, simply hypnotized and forced me to take a clean plate again and go "catching up". By the way, in some photos there were scenes with crayfish and a large fish, there was none of that. Well, what else can I say... animation-test, especially the concept of KINDERGARTEN - the team simply worked amazingly! Sometimes it was even a pity for the children - they were so involved in the games that they did not see the sea at all. Probably, the animators do not want to take responsibility and do not take the kids either to the sea or to the slides and so on. So what conclusions do we draw - the hotel is cool, but everything there is imprisoned not for a quiet elite holiday, but for a large-scale buffet table at the bass. After how many years of flights to Lanka, Goa, the islands, the Turkish kind of happiness is no longer for me. And the last thing I can’t help but say is that I have NEVER seen such a number of our super cute girls per 1 square meter of a hotel....
Even the overdosed staff reacted differently to our Beauties, or, after all, are they being given bromine to drink? It is almost impossible to survive in such an overdose of female beauty! Another thoughtful moment - the disco rumbles until 0300 and the sounds all fly away to the sea - that's a trifle, but how nice. And yet, the view of the surrounding mountains, and Tahtalli is just wonderful... Here is a little silence for this hotel... well, at least a little... Have a good rest to everyone who confirms the choice of this hotel! And thanks to the team - after all, it is very difficult to respect such a crowd of ours!
The board returned to Ukraine... she met with a classic hai about the order and "she-stupid".