Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017. Part 23. We pass to water procedures.

13 May 2018 Travel time: with 29 May 2017 on 16 June 2017
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Guangzhou 2017-06-14 14 14 14 14 14 14 . p>

At four o'clock in the morning we sit on the steps of a luxurious sauna and smoke.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

Or rather, I smoke, and Nadia patiently waits until the cigarette smoke puts my brain in order and I can speak normal Chinese, and not just swearing Russian. A guard is rubbing nearby, asking what we need here, why we don’t go in, where we came from. I smoke, I nod "yes" to all questions, it always helps to keep a nice conversation. On my "Women shi Wukelan ren" (we are Ukrainians), the guard hangs a little. He obviously does not know what Vukelan is. Yes, what is there to be surprised, in the first bath they could not even understand their native chutsuche, not like the name of a distant country. Although, here in Indonesia they know Ukraine and even know who Shevchenko is) As soon as they heard Ukraine, they immediately asked again - Ukraine? Andriy Shevchenko? )


A slight geographical digression and a cigarette really helped me balance. Well, it's unpleasant, yes, but there's nothing to be done, let's go to the bathhouse.

There is nothing inside.

A small empty rectangle of a corridor and a hint of an elevator. The elevator button is not visible. We sigh and return to the guard. He sighs in response, goes with us and shows where the elevator button is.

Finally, we get into a huge hall, in the middle there is a mini pool with water and a small stone installation. Such a pathetic fountain. Marble.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

And a huge receptionist. Beauty and luxury. Fresh flowers.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

I repack my suitcase and backpack to check in my luggage and take clean things with me, otherwise after sleepingbass I look like a rumpled bum.

A short check-in (I remind you that you need a passport to get into the bathhouse! ) And we are in the coveted paradise.

I liked this bath much more. It is newer than bathhouse No. 8, more modern, more beautiful, more comfortable.

Nothing works yet, we quickly go to the shower, change into pajamas and sleep. On the way, we try to beg the staff for water. Pour hot, of course. In China, they don't drink cold water and they don't advise us.

I can’t lie down comfortably, I’m spinning until breakfast. The crib in the baths is a chair that, with the help of a remote control, fully unfolds into a bed. But there is a separate ottoman near my legs, and for some reason, I have it all the time.

In this bath, the bedroom is divided by low partitions into small blocks of five beds each.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

Breakfast comes, the vacuum cleaner turns on, you still can't sleep.

The breakfast is wonderful. Firstly, we are already shot sparrows, we don’t row anything. Secondly, they obviously do not save on food. I choose cabbage with egg. At home I tried to repeat, but alas, it does not work out so tasty. (The stick is tasteless, just dough). Well, egg tarts are always out of competition)

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

The dining room is very cozy and beautiful, there are sofas with soft pillows, there are simple chairs. There are very few people.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.


What is bad about the baths is a well-defined time for eating. Now everyone is full and what to do? You can't be in the water for at least an hour. Let's go to sleep. The vacuum cleaner has moved closer to us and even earplugs do not save.

There is an idea to find out where everything is (cinema, gym, playroom), but I do not find the stairs up. And somehow it so happened that here I am already on the first floor, and around it is twilight and candles. And nobody. Where do all the people escape the vacuum cleaner?

Usually you can’t take pictures in the baths, I went up and asked for permission, but the photos turned out badly, the light was very blurry.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

They say that the bathhouse was closed for reconstruction, it is quite possible that it has a different design now.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

The lockers are in separate rooms with transparent curtains, but it's still more private than in Beijing Bath No. 8, where we changed right on the aisle, next to the dressing tables. Those who were embarrassed to look at us point-blank had the opportunity to surreptitiously look sideways through the mirror.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

The showers here are individual, very large, they are whole rooms, they have everything you might need to put yourself in order - toothbrushes with pastes, razors with shaving gel, shampoo, hair gel, shower gel, body scrub. bodies, combs, lots of napkins.

There is a sauna. I think there is also a Roman steam room, but it does not work. There are baths with many different saunas, or how to say... bath rooms)) I once saw a video from a Shanghai bath, there were a lot of different saunas, and even in the general department. Here all this is in the wet zone, that is, separately for women, separately for men.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

There are two pools. One with very hot water, quite deep, there is a bench around the perimeter. Sit quietly, warm up. The second one is quite large, not very hot, equipped with interesting features.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.


First, the waterfall. It is small, but the water flows with great pressure, it knocks you down. Secondly, there are seats - jacuzzi. You sit on this, press the button, the water hits from below and massages the sirloin) Thirdly, two curved loungers with water massage of different intensity. On one, the water beats in thin streams and not very intensely, and on the other, the jets are thicker and hit harder. Still, in the opposite side from the seats, you can turn on direct jets of water. I walked along the side of the pool and turned on all the buttons in a row and squealed with pleasure. This is a SPA, I understand))

There were few visitors that day or it was still early, but with me there were only three young Chinese women, almost children, one of them was so shy that she climbed into the pool in her underwear. No one forced her to undress from which I concluded that it was possible and so. Although, in Chinese baths it is customary to be naked.

The girls immediately climbed into the hot pool. But you can't sit there for more than two minutes. We went out and sat in chairs. As soon as the client sits down in a chair, he is immediately offered to get up to choose a treat for himself. Tea, fruits (including tomatoes)) are on a table near the pool.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

You walk past - no one offers. Just sat down - they come to you and persistently persuade you to treat yourself.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

After the treat, in theory, it is better not to meddle in hot water. But girls seem to have limited time. They storm "my" pool and turn on all the buttons) I reluctantly release their foothold.

I sit down in a chair, a girl immediately comes up with tea. I ask her how about tshotsao (the procedure is similar to our peeling, only more intense) and they take me to the "ripping".

The magic begins. Just seventeen days ago, my body was skinned to the bone, and here again I am grimy to black. They pour hot water over me and scrub with a stiff brush, without sparing. The smell is slightly reminiscent of vinegar, but it does not sting the reddened skin, it is unlikely that there is some kind of acid there. Despite some awkwardness (we still have more limited impact zones on peelings), I completely relax, give myself into the hands of the master, and she scratches and scrapes from left to right, from right to left, from top to bottom, from bottom to top, not forgetting to periodically pour hot water.

- Shall we smear with clay or milk?

I emerge from the slumber.

-What's better? How much does it cost?


The pleasure is not very expensive, after a short discussion, the girl offers to smear me with both. I still don't know anything about such things, so I nod and sign the check (134 yuan for everything, including the peel itself).

It turns out that massage is done on milk. Incredible feeling. Milk spreads like velvet over the heated skin, the masseuse's gentle hands flutter in this milky paradise, and I fall asleep again. It's a shame just how I love to sleep through the massage.

Then the turn of the clay comes, the spreading happens quite quickly, I am taken to the sauna, after giving out a small towel from the refrigerator. The towel is wet, they are supposed to cover their mouth and nose so as not to inhale the hot steam. 5 minutes in the sauna and the clay must be washed off. Do not use shower gel.

Before visiting Chinese baths, I had never been in a sauna precisely because I was afraid of hot air. Now sometimes I allow myself, but I always take a wet cold towel.

Since I am afraid of high temperatures, I may not have sat through the required 5 minutes in the sauna, but the skin after that clay was still incredible. Or maybe after milk) I need to try to smear myself with milk at home)

I sit down in an armchair to rest, they bring me tea and offer to treat myself to fruit. I eat a banana and traditionally slip into the jacuzzi. Well, the pool is completely empty, how not to use it)

I lie on the jacuzzi lounger for no more than a couple of minutes, mommy comes with a girl, the girl frolics noisily, maybe it's time for me to go to sleep.

I bring Nadia an apple and news about a wonderful peeling. She goes to the procedures, and I fall asleep. What good fellows these Chinese. Such a concept of relaxation was invented! Just right for me.

You can do everything many things in these cribs. You can sleep. Watch TV. Chew an apple. To drink coffee. Or juices. Manicure, pedicure, foot massage. Clean your ears. Cut nose hair. Some Chinese even manage to smoke. And here you can't smoke. And you can't speak loudly. The entire lounge is divided into small areas by low partitions. We do not see those who lie on the previous row, but we hear them well.


- Qing bu shohua! (Shut up, please! ) I politely ask the screaming men. They guess rather than understand me, giggle, but fall silent.

I read before the trip that you can certainly ask the Chinese not to do something, but he will smile affectionately and continue to do what is convenient for him. But field trials on this topic proved otherwise) I asked and it worked) they fell silent.

I remember that I need to book accommodation for the next night, the price in our hotel (in the hotel that we booked for the night before flying home) is no longer as sweet as three months ago, but there is a discount and it pleases. Of course, if I understood that I would have to spend the night there for two nights, and not one, then I would have booked something simpler, and not a five at the metro. Looking ahead - this hotel was a real five and worth every penny. It's a pity that for 68 dollars a day you can't rent a hotel of this class somewhere in a resort)

I set an alarm so I don't oversleep my lunch and finally fall asleep.

I'll tell you honestly - waking up for dinner with an alarm clock - it was my old dream) In general, the bathhouse delighted me incredibly. A fairy tale, not a holiday. There is nothing cooler than wallowing, steaming, wallowing, eating, wallowing, steaming, wallowing... And again there is)

Lunch in the bath is more abundant than breakfast. We sit by the window, on the sofas, among the pillows. Just relax)

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

We dine for a long time before dinner.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

The open kitchen is visible through the glass.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

In the morning, the cook was making dumplings there, and now they are serving soup.

After dinner I still want to sleep. I also want a foot massage, but sleep more.

I turn on the TV. There are no headphones here, the speakers are placed right at the head of the chair. If you can’t hear well, then you can raise your “ears” like in an airplane seat.

Staff walks between chairs offering different services. I forgot the word massage and I'm too lazy to get my phone to use the translator. I fall asleep and I dream about the word massage - anmo.


The sleeping room is in constant twilight, if you don't take your phone with you, it's generally unclear what time it is.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

I wonder when the time of stay ends, the visitor is warned? Or if you scribbled the exit for ten minutes, they take money for one more day?

When I wake up, I go for a little steam in the pool with a jacuzzi, then in the shower. I get my hair done so I can leave right after dinner. There was an idea to go to the tower, to look at the flower city.

The dressing tables in this bath are delightful, besides, all the cosmetics are very pleasant. It's the little things like that that give the impression of a holiday.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

There were no cosmetics at the hot springs, neither in Syli, nor in Longshen. Although we were not in the common locker rooms in Longsheng, maybe there is something there. But in the rooms of an expensive hotel there was only a standard set: shampoo-gels.

The time before supper had passed imperceptibly. I don’t feel like eating yet, but I can’t leave this realm of freebies without having supper. I definitely need it for dinner, because the bath is the main meal. What's not here! )

Columns of strainers with a variety of bao and jiao tzu rise up.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

Steam vats of vegetables. Meat, fish, as well as a variety of paws, a great variety. Drinks, fruits, desserts, salads, nuts. There is even sushi.

We collect different goodies. Then some more creme brulee. Then more creme brulee. Then more creme brulee. Aaaah! Stop me)

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

We observe an interesting picture. Among all this abundance, a girl walks with a large plate and one sushi lying lonely on it. One circle cuts. Second. He looks into the plates, into the pots. He sadly looks down at his plate and enters the next round.

There is nothing to eat here at all - I hear her thoughts) - next time I will go to another bathhouse.

I'm not ready to leave right after the fourth creme brulee. I crawl into bed again. Let at least the fat be tied))

But no matter how long you wait, you need to move, because we still have a flower city waiting for us, Guangzhou is famous for more than one bath)


We go to reception at eight o'clock. They understand Chutsuche and call me right away, apparently my Chinese has improved during the trip.

We go by the counter, the amount turned out to be quite small, sorry, I didn’t write it down. Don't go to Guangzhou without a meter. There is an inexpensive taxi, and when bargaining, you will definitely be told the amount is twice as high as the meter counts.

I track the route along MepsMe and when we almost coincide with the “hotel” point, I look up and see a huge hotel building, and in the distance, at the main entrance, majestic fountains beat among a whole oasis of beautiful greenery.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

This picture eclipsed my mind, and I wailed:

- Stop, stop! We've arrived!

The driver stopped.

- Are you sure you're here?

- Yes!

- Would you like this hotel?

- Yes!

- We need to turn around.

- Not necessary! We'll go on foot!

He takes out our suitcases and we, joyful, stomp along the path to the entrance. Fragrant people pass by. The scent of luxury is in the air.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

- Tanya, how much does this hotel cost? Nadia asks carefully.

- Don't worry, mere pennies, there was a big discount on Booking. O! That's where I'll smoke! – I point to the fountains opposite the entrance.

We go into the hall.

There are a lot of people, a uniformed employee comes up to us.

- Do you speak English - I ask him.

- Yes.

I happily hand over the young man to Nadia.

- Talk to the person in English)

I relax, there is no need to strain the brain, catching Chinese names from memory. Now it's Nadina's turn to talk)

They take away our luggage and take us to the next hall - huge and gilded.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

I shake my head and start taking pictures.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

Suddenly Nadia calls me.

The hotel does not see our booking.

Well, I’m no longer used to such situations, nothing even stirred inside. They find it, they're not going anywhere. In addition, when booking, I did not forget to translate the language into Chinese and take a screenshot of the reservation. I show the phone to the administrator.

- This is not our hotel.

Here you go!


A young employee with our suitcases escorts us back to the exit, in no way showing that we have become uninteresting to him. Explains that our hotel is opposite.

Let's go look for it opposite. Nadia is sad. Such a beautiful hotel and not ours.

-Yes, how did you mix it up?

I'm laughing.

-But, thanks to this, you and I lived in such luxury for ten whole minutes! ))

On the contrary, it is not so easy to get there. Busy road. The transition is airy, that is, it is a bridge. We carry our suitcases upstairs, then down the stairs.

- Oh, how far will you have to go smoking))

Our hotel is not as luxurious as the previous one, although it is also very, very beautiful.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

Check-in is quick, we go up to the room and and - wow! - suddenly from my mother's bedroom there is a red washbasin in the hallway.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

The room is very good!

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

In addition, the hotel has a swimming pool on the roof, though they are not allowed to go there without a cap. It's good that they don't require a certificate from a Chinese doctor.

I really want to go to the pool, but the tower and the flower city are waiting for us. And no cap.

We know how to get to the flower city by metro, but it's already evening, we don't want to waste time. We take a taxi.

Taxis in Guangzhou are very interesting - they have bars between the driver and passengers. I dare to assume that they do not take passengers to the front seat. And taxi drivers really do not like to ride on meters. We insist, do not get into the car, turn our heads, look out for another taxi. The driver gives up. It turned out exactly half of the amount that he called at first.

But the taxi driver brought us almost to the embankment, leaving the flower city far behind.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

Therefore, our walking route was strange. We walked backwards, periodically looking back at the tower.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

The flower city was supposed to amaze our imagination, but, alas, in Guilin we have already been in a fairy tale, a faint resemblance of which was now in the flower shop.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

This place looked mysterious and deserted.


In Guangzhou, I had a lot of plans and only one day. The most important thing for today is to buy gifts home, because when traveling with luggage in public transport, you can’t really afford shopping.

I'm just curious to hear your opinions, dear colleagues, where in the world's trading capital can you buy at least something? Not for a million Chinese money, not a rag in rhinestones, and not twenty tons in bulk? Surely you have interesting places to shop? Please share!

And I can only tell you how not to do it.

No need to go to the central station (Guangzhou Railway Station metro), stomp a kilometer underground there to exit F2, no need to circle under the scorching sun among shopping centers (markets) and look for a white horse there. All of these markets have the hieroglyph horse in their name, and they all sell the same drants.

Vocabulary:

Drantya- absolutely unwearable things that look like they were taken from a homeless person who has been lovingly cherishing these rags since 1992.

If you have already reached this herd of horses, go to any and make sure that you do not need anything here. And if something still appeals to you, do not try to measure it. There are simply no fitting rooms.

But you also don’t need to go to pretentious shopping centers, for example, near the Taojin subway (we used to live there). The prices will blow you off your feet. Although, perhaps you just dreamed of buying jeans for 3 thousand dollars, and here is your dream in an inconspicuous boutique.

There is also no need to try to find a more or less sane shopping center by the presence of chain stores in them. We found a H&M store on Mepsmi, stomped to it for a long time, in the hope that we would definitely find a lot of other, inexpensive stores there. But it was not there. All floors and the basement were occupied only by H&M. Out of grief, I even bought a T-shirt I didn’t need there, but all because I piggy the day before was not too persistently looking for laundry in Yangshuo, and in Guangzhou this service turned out to be very expensive. It was cheaper to buy).

What should we have done right in the morning?


Correctly! - go to Beijing Street! Consumer goods (read - souvenirs) for 10-15 yuan there are a dime a dozen (by the way, T-shirts for 10), and there is also Miniso.

Only recently I found out that there are also enough of these Miniso in Kyiv, and one of them is located in a shopping center, next to my house)

Beijing Street has everything we needed in Guangzhou.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

There is even a pavement under glass. She is many years old and she will stand for the same amount of time with such a careful attitude.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

With pleasure, we wandered around the small shops, admired the Asian flavor of the city.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

My leg ached very badly, apparently my margin of safety had ended. I sit in a cafe, I'm sad, and Nadia examines the territory. The last attempt to bring home the gifts ends in the supermarket, which is located here, next to the cafe. The feeling of guilt before the family (almost three weeks in China and nothing to bring them! ) Pushes me to recklessness. I buy everything in a row) I still have unopened ones: a package with seaweed and a package with some seasonings, my husband claims that this is generally fried sesame. I'm afraid no one will ever print it again. And I threw out cookies and sweets with durian after three months. Why did you buy? My family loves dried durian, but this supermarket didn't have it.

On this high note, having discarded all plans for this city due to fatigue and my foot illness, loaded with purchases, we went to the hotel, moreover, by metro. Was I in vain looking for a hotel a stone's throw from the metro? )

On this day, we fully fulfilled the plan for the metro, since it was not possible to implement other plans.

Limping to the pool, I swam and lay in the jacuzzi until late at night, watching the evening fall on the city.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

Don't worry or go to the bathhouse! China-2017.

This is the end of our trip to China.

In the morning we flew to Moscow. At the Guangzhou airport, they took away my USB-cigarette lighter, we also ate a very expensive fruit salad with mayonnaise (! ) and exchanged yuan for dollars with a crazy commission.

By the way, this airport has a smoking room! There is nothing else to remember about Guangzhou Airport.


In Moscow, with sobs parted, Nadia flew to Milan, and the next day I went to Kyiv by train.

I am very glad that fate brought me together with my fellow traveler Nadia, and I am very grateful to Nadia that she took care of all everyday issues and never left me anywhere and came up with a title for this report)

I hope, Nadyusha, that someday you and I will ride around the globe together! )

And I thank all readers for patience in reading my report, for comments and likes! May your dreams come true!

Translated automatically from Russian. View original
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