memoirs of a beer alcoholic
Some users of the site say that I write well, they recommended me to write more. I decided not to break down and still write. But, since no new trips are foreseen yet, but I need to have some fun, I will write about the old ones. And sclerosis is getting stronger! Details have, of course, been erased. I looked through the pictures - the amnesia receded a little, there were still vivid impressions, there were!
So, summer 2010, end of July. At that time, my asset was a three-time visit to Egypt and that was all, my experience of foreign trips was limited to this. I decided that it was time to expand the geography and aim at Europe. But dear, unfortunately, they did not let go at work, so I had to take a child as a companion. I can’t stand a joint vacation with children, but I had no choice. Went to TA. For the first Schengen, of course, something simpler was required. And they did find it - a last-minute tour to the Czech Republic from Davklub for 160 euros. She brought a certificate of salary - the agency said that it can be wiped. With such a salary, I am not allowed to travel abroad. But the girls-travel agents knew the matter poorly, and bungled some kind of linden. As a result, my daughter and I still received visas.
Protarakhtev on the train for more than a day, in the morning we arrived in the hero city of Lvov. Departure for the tour only in the evening, but for now - a gift from the company in the form of a free tour of the city. In Lvov, my daughter and I were once each - I was in my deep youth, the child was in my own (three years ago with the class). There is nothing left in my memory except for the old pharmacy, so I can say that I was here for the first time. We walked, looked, chipped in for milk to a starving pig (more precisely, his mistress), vytrischalysya on a gang of bikers and their cars, and also surveyed the panorama of the city from the tower. Well, nothing like that, they were satisfied.
In the evening we returned to the station, waited for our bus (most of the people were traveling from Kyiv). Theoretically, we could also get on there, but I reasoned that a bad train is better than a good bus. The seats we got were not even the worst - in the middle of the bus. The name of the leader of the group, as I remember right now, was Oleg Kharchenko. Cheerful type. Immediately declared that during the trip he will be both mom and dad to us. He didn’t take away his passport, he said: you can go wherever you want, but on the day of departure everyone should be like a bayonet, otherwise he will tell you where to go. Several people took advantage of his kind permission, and we had the good fortune to see them only on the day of departure from the hotel to our homeland with a check-in for the last elective.
The people on the bus were mixed - a rather young mother with a rather adult son, again, a rather young father, but with a younger son, several young girls, singles and couples, and so on. In general, it was a pleasure to talk to both me and my daughter. Olezhka began to collect denyushka for electives. Since we were the first time, we took everything we had - Karlovy Vary, Dresden, some castle, a brewery and some other town where the bones were stored. Yes, and a boat ride. In total, almost the cost of the tour came out, are you doing it?
Arrived at the border. There was a small dutik. I asked Oleg how much Becherovka costs in the Czech Republic? Said about 12 euros. And here at 8.50. And, following my example, the entire bus stocked up with Becherovka (and they did it right). On the way, our mom-dad entertained us as best he could, telling us how funny the Czech language is. For example, “beautiful woman” in Czech sounds like “terrible toad”, “spirits” - “stinkers”, “prostitute” - “daughter-in-law”, “fruits” - “sheep”, and all that.
Arrived in Prague in the morning. Since the check-in at the hotel was only after lunch, we went for a boat ride. There was a very timely, quite decent buffet and they even poured Becherovka in a gramulechka. Since my child is a non-drinker (and in whom only - they probably mixed it up in the maternity hospital), I got two gramules. There are still some advantages to traveling with older children.
Let's go settle down. I naively hoped that the hotel was within walking distance of the old town. Yep, right now! They brought us who knows where, to a sleeping area. I like to walk, but it is desirable that there is something to see along the way. And you can admire the usual sleeping area at home. Hotel Juno 3 * is a tall building. Settled quickly. The room is like a room, without frills and with a gorgeous view of the roof of a neighboring building. Our gentle guardian gave us quite a bit of time to put ourselves in order. The people were outraged, because many spent more than a day on the bus and felt, to put it mildly, stale. But Oleg was relentless - the schedule is tough, and took us on a walking tour. To do this, we went down to the subway and drove a few stops (at our own expense, of course). We left in the old town, where a female guide was waiting for us. An emigrant from the Union, a doctor by profession, but something didn’t work out there, so she works as a guide. But the person in his place - so much, interesting, and most importantly enthusiastically talked about Prague. I'm sorry I didn't remember anything. Loved the peacock park. Near the Kafka Museum there is an original fountain "pissing men". We didn't go to the museum. I once took a book by the above-named author from the library in order to raise my level, so to speak, but I didn’t master more than ten pages - bullshit (forgive me, fans of his high art). For this reason, I don’t know what the described (in the good sense of the word) men symbolized, but they look amusing.
After the tour, Olezhik finally led a small group (7-8 people) of the suffering to where it was possible to quench my thirst for beauty, because of which I, in fact, went here - to a pub. He ran through some kind of tunnel, through some kind of store, and we ended up in the basement, hung with some kind of cans, watering cans, mugs, alarm clocks and other rubbish. The institution was called "Staromestsky brewer" (or maybe Novomestsky). The beer there was just amazing (as I understand it, they brew it there). Both light and dark, and I especially liked the cut one. In general, I cut myself cut. Simply, beer is my only love. If I feel only sympathy for other strong drinks, then I love beer devotedly and wholeheartedly. They say that beer grows breasts (or belly, as you're lucky). Girls! Don't believe me, you bastards are lying! I would have been a size 10! And the stomach did not work out (thank God! ).
I don’t really remember what they ate that time, I only remember a soup from a tripe - I took it for fun. The scar, as I understand it, is someone's stomach (either pork or beef). I once had a friend, a very peculiar type. An avid dog lover, he raised two bull terriers, so he regularly bought this same stomach (a tripe, that is) on the market and cooked it, and he did it, often right at work, and not yet himself, but forced the girls subordinate to him (mocked, as desired). The smell was very specific, and it was tempting to vomit. But the ordered soup, surprisingly, was quite edible, and even tasty somewhere. In general, the evening passed in a warm and friendly atmosphere, and the day turned out to be very long, but very fruitful. They returned to the hotel by metro and literally passed out.
In the morning we went for breakfast. Very powerful, well, except that there was no borscht. And mashed potatoes, and sausages, and salads, and cheeses and fruits, not to mention all sorts of muesli-shmuesli. Buried and went to an elective in Karlovy Vary. And the weather was not very good - rain and dog cold (20 degrees, no more). For us it was such a game - the rain at the end of July! But by the time we arrived, thank God, the weather cleared up. The town is just lovely! The guide took us to all the springs and I tried some water from each, because I was the only one who thought to take a hiking mug with me. There, special ceramic cups with spouts were sold in the stalls, but people were greedy to buy them. The newfound friends with whom they were in the cafe yesterday drank from my mug (unhygienic, of course, but no one died). True, all or almost all sources were with hot water, and the mug was thermo, therefore, it was still a pleasure to swallow boiling water. After the tour, we were given a couple of hours of free time. There was an opportunity to climb the tower of Diana, or go to the pool with thermal water. My daughter and I and another group of comrades chose the latter. The outdoor pool was not cheap (200 crowns (8 euros) for an hour and a half, in my opinion), and we had a little more than an hour. I, as a person who earns money by overwork, as they say, beat off the grandmother in full - without stopping, I plowed the expanses of the pool. And my daughter and her girlfriend stood at the side and sang almost all this time. Bum. And the other two girls (not from our group) generally came here to take pictures purely.
Then we were taken to a free tasting of Becherovka, where I again took advantage of my advantage - I drank for two. True, the portions, as usual, were scanty, and it was not possible to cut (yet). A bottle of classic Becherovka, as Oleg said, cost about 12 euros, and everyone has already bought up at 8.50 on a dutik. They took only lemon and some other, which were not on the deutik. Before the tasting, there was a short excursion, where we were told that the Becherovka recipe is kept in the strictest confidence. Yes Yes! Arriving home, I surfed the Internet and found what I was looking for on the Odessa forum. Odessans are smart, they can do everything. According to their recipe, this drink was made several times - neither we nor the friends who were treated to the difference noticed.
Not without regret, leaving a pleasant town, we rushed to another very nice place - the Krusovice brewery. The local guide, apparently a smart woman, did not bore us with lengthy stories, galloped us through all the shops and took us to a tasting. As stated, the tasting was limited only by time. In front of each participant in the drinking bout, two two-hundred-gram glasses were placed - with light and dark beer. While everyone clapped their ears, listening to the chatter of the guide, I managed to drain both. My aunt looked at me with respect and said that now you can go up to the bar and take the beer you like, as much as you can handle. Well, I only managed eight glasses, and the adult son of a young mother - ten. And all this, as you remember, after some water and Becherovka. And urinary something not rubber. But embarrassment, fortunately, did not happen, somehow we reached the hotel. The boy, however, was at the limit. Summarizing, I will say - the second day, the flight is normal. It was interesting and fun.
The next day there was an optional excursion to the castle. It was raining again. But what kind of summer is so naked with them? You can’t take pictures inside (or maybe for an additional fee, I don’t remember). Particularly not impressed. Sitting beds are cool for ladies, so as not to ruin their hair. But near the castle there was a cafe with prices lower than in Prague. This circumstance somewhat brightened up the trip. After the castle we returned to Prague, where we had a walking tour (in the rain) along the other bank of the Vltava. Vitus Cathedral, the presidential palace and all that. The entire female part of the group, in turn and in different poses, took a picture near the man in the guard booth (more precisely, near the booth with the man). Poor soldier. But in old age there will be something to tell the grandchildren: “And such garbage, babies, skin day! ”. The grapes growing almost in the center of the city looked cool. On the way back to the other side, we went to several street cafes, but the prices there bite, and it was wet. We went to look for the cellar where we had been on the first day. Since Oleg left us for some reason, they searched for quite a long time, but by joint efforts they did find it. This time we ordered the famous knee. I can’t say that I was delighted, but one serving was enough for three of us. Well, and beer, of course. Then the cub asked to stay with his girlfriend to see the night city, and the young mother and I decided to return to the hotel, because at our age the main thing is a fairly long sleep. But on the way we turned into a supermarket (not Bill, not Tesco), which is not far from the hotel. God, how delicious it was! One hundred and forty-eight beers! You can't let me in there. The prices seemed to be the same as at the brewery, but then they realized that they were not - more expensive for the cost of the container (it is added separately). Since we had already stocked up at the factory, we only bought two bottles of Kozla to end the day. There was no point in taking more (in the absence of a refrigerator). Why I chose "Goat" and not something else, I'll never know. Too much assortment, as usual, knocked me off my pantalyk. I buy perfumes on a dutik in the same way - I choose, I choose, but then they announce landing, and I grab the first ones that come across, and then I lament - why didn’t I buy those over there?
We also bought home liqueurs - mint and egg. Returning to the hotel, we had a pleasant chat over a beer and went to bed. By the way, I did not notice the difference between this goat and Ukrainian-made, which was bought at home. For the price, by the way, it was also almost the same. From this I made a conclusion for myself: draft Czech is a thing, and bottled - it is bottled.
The next day was an excursion to Dresden. It didn't rain, thank God. After a short tour, we were taken to an art gallery. Loved her yard. It was impossible to take pictures inside, the aunts are vigilant. But when it is impossible, one is drawn to violate the ban. Therefore, I could not resist the temptation and tried to take a picture of the Sistine Madonna. And I almost succeeded, but the flash fired for so long, and at the last moment my hand trembled, so nothing happened, the picture turned out to be blurry. Well, okay! Dresden is also called Northern Florence (or German, I don't remember). The original is still better in my opinion. Somewhere along the way I bought a glass of beer - it seemed that Czech was tastier, maybe because I had to drink this beer in a hurry.
In the evening of the same day there was an elective "singing fountains". They played some songs and dances of the peoples of the world (Dvorak, it seems). Did not like. Freddy Mercury, for example, would be preferable.
On the last day of our stay behind the cordon, we had to leave the hotel for good, in full force to go to the town with a warehouse of bones and then to the house, to the hut. But I didn’t really want to look at the skulls protected by UNESCO (I can imagine what kind of energy there is). Therefore, having persuaded several people, on the eve of departure, we pestered Oleg with a proposal to replace this elective with a trip to Vienna. It turned out that this is theoretically possible, but, firstly, you will have to pay a little extra, and secondly, you will have to get the consent of the whole group. By hook or by crook, we got our way and chatted the whole bus, except for one man, who appeared only in the morning before departure. He stated that he had already been to Vienna, but obeying the majority, he agreed. So we also visited Vienna.
Well, what can I say for Vienna? I wanted to see the city about which all my friends buzzed my ears (Ah Vienna! , Oh Vienna! ) Palaces, cathedrals, parks - it's all wonderful, but the impression was spoiled by the dull Danube chained in concrete and the concrete beach, on which they only sunbathe, and bathe in the shower. Darkness! And also horses… No, I have nothing against them, but the smell from their calorie collectors! But everything is decent, noble. In general, I did not share the enthusiasm of my friends. Well, Vienna, so what? I do not argue, you need to live in the city to get to know him, but that was enough for me. At the moment, having already traveled a little, I came up with a formula for myself: I want to be where there is a sea (ocean) or mountains (the higher, the better), ideally both, the presence of many palm trees and evergreens is also welcome , and also the sun and no rain (well, let it go at night, if there is no way without it). All other factors are secondary. Vienna lovers can throw slippers at me, but here is my opinion!
The trip as a whole was pleasant, everything was smooth, without overlays. Davklub mastered this route, apparently, a long time ago, so there were no jambs (which cannot be said about my next trip with this travel agency, which I described earlier http://blogs.turpravda.com/Iren48/61343.html. The leader of the group, despite I liked a lot of negative reviews about him on the Internet. also picked up sincere.
Then they asked me: “Well, you were in the Czech Republic, you drank beer there. How can you drink something different now? ” How-how, with pleasure! I will tell you one recipe (it is unlikely that it will be useful to someone, but still):
1. To wave a dozen kilometers in the morning through the mountains or along the sea (ocean)
2. The air temperature should be around 30.
3. Zahekany and with his tongue out, you settle down with the maximum possible convenience somewhere in the immediate vicinity of the sea (ocean) and drink half a glass of local ice-cold (preferably draft) beer in one gulp,
4. Slowly finish drinking the rest.
Repeat the procedure until you are completely satisfied (in the sense of drinking more, it’s not worth climbing mountains anymore). And believe that this beer will taste better than any Czech beer. To enhance the effect, you can accidentally forget to take water with you on a hike. "Karlovachko" in Croatia, "Efes" in Turkey, "Lion" in Sri Lanka, "Crimea" guess where, but just "Chernihiv" or "Sarmat" at home on the Belosarai Spit - with this approach, they turn into a divine drink. I repeat that my recipe is not suitable for anyone, but my concept of relaxation is just that. I don’t overwork much at work, so hyperactive rest is my thing. This is me to the fact that I will not return to Prague just for the sake of beer. However, it does not satisfy my idea of an ideal place to relax.
On the way from Vienna we stopped in Budapest, where we were given 15 minutes to photograph the evening city. In the morning we arrived in Lviv, a small group (together with us) landed, and the rest continued on their way to Kyiv. It was a little sad to part with nice people. We handed over our luggage, which had doubled in size, to the storage room and went for a walk around Lviv. After walking up and drinking beer, but already local, we returned to the station to pick up things. I gave the token to the luggage storage worker. He brought the suitcase, but there was no package for the krushovice. To my question: “Where is it? ” - "Nema! " - say. What a joker! Yes, I can kill for beer! Brings: "Nate your beer! ". And jealousy is not good! In general, the beer was safely brought home and drunk very quickly and single-handedly (with a nice touch, of course). A bottle of Bozhkov mint liqueur was presented to a friend with a similar surname (he hid from us that he was an underground liquor magnate). The rest of the drinks were drunk much more slowly with friends.
Something like that. If experts in Europe have noticed any inconsistencies, forgive me - the memory, you know, is girlish.
