Dear friends! This is a story about a vacation in Mexico at the Oasis Cancun Light Hotel. In a separate review, all the subtleties of rest in this hotel simply did not fit. The shortest review could look like this: Never, for any discount, choose this hotel for your vacation, namely its cheapest part called Oasis Cancun Light. With a probability of 80 percent, you will be unlucky, and the night part of your rest can turn into a daily struggle with bloodsucking ghouls who will drain your strength and vitamin D accumulated over a beautiful sunny day. And the quality of your rest will directly depend on the susceptibility of your nervous system and on the number and upbringing of the constantly American, Mexican, Canadian, Colombian and other youth surrounding you.
But there is another side of the coin: clean, well-groomed and beautiful territory, nature, greenery, coconut palms, gentle warm sun, livestock, cozy restaurants and good food, live ocean, good beach, comfortable and large swimming pool, excellent service, friendly and helpful staff and a lot of other positive things - all this well-being makes your stay at the hotel almost heavenly.
And if you still decide to spend your well-deserved vacation in this “easy” hotel, I would like to share with you my personal impressions and some subtleties of this, believe me, a multifaceted and unforgettable vacation in its own way. I will not impose my opinion on you, but just want to help you make the right choice.
This hotel is both beautiful and terrible!
And if you do not have nostalgia for the noisy, cheerful and, undoubtedly, interesting student life in a hostel, especially at night, and you dream of an expensive, beautiful, calm, family vacation on the shores of the azure smooth surface of the gentle ocean, then this place is not for you! My wife and daughters and I had a great rest in February 2018, but sometimes we had to refine a lot and make our vacation unforgettable ourselves. All you have to do is prepare a little, avoid a few ambushes, and accept some things as inevitable...
But there is one very suspiciously profitable offer from the tour operator Aneks tour, to the Oasis Light hotel. We were immediately warned that it would be noisy and fun. We didn't know then how much. We thought that, as always, we would ask for a quiet room and enjoy an unforgettable vacation. Moreover, a letter was sent from the travel agency to Anex Tour with a request for a remote, quiet room for a family with a child.
I'll get ahead of myself - no one saw the letter at the hotel. Having issued all the necessary documents, we went to a paradise on earth.
The flight was operated by Azur Air. The whole journey from home to the hotel took exactly 24 hours, taking into account Moscow traffic jams and a sixteen-hour flight with landing for refueling at Punta Cana Airport in the Dominican Republic. About flights there and back, you can write a separate story. But in principle, nothing terrible. Just a little cramped. Very long-legged and full for this flight, the road is closed. You will definitely have to fork out for a more expensive tour operator and air carrier. The rest in cramped but not offended. The seats are narrow, the distance between the rows is minimized. The plane is ideal for transporting 360 pioneers to the health camp. Personally, I periodically became numb, and part of the way back and forth, along with other sufferers, flew standing at emergency exits.
There were very few handrails, like in the subway or bus
For a flight to Mexico, Azur Air provides a Boeing 767-300, with a 2-4-2 lineup. There is an online check-in at Domodedovo Airport, from where the airline's flights depart. Starts in 24 hours. It is better to go to the Azura website in advance, get comfortable and stretch your fingers. Because from the first minute of registration, places fly like hot cakes. Two hours after the start of registration, you can no longer sit next to a family of three in the first, second, or even third salons. And when you receive the documents, check the availability of ticket numbers. There were several separated families on the plane who were not assigned these numbers. They registered only at the airport for the remaining seats. Then they walked around the plane and searched in vain for someone to change with. And no one changes, because almost everyone is flying with their families. There is no online check-in at Cancun airport on the way back.
And at Domodedovo airport, also on the way back, there is no "pipe" for Azur Air. Tested on three flights. We took off at plus 30 and arrived at minus 20. For some time, the plane turned into a huge dressing room in order to have time to change clothes before meeting the harsh reality and slide down the icy ramp into a cold bus.
The very trip to Mexico initially implies not only enjoying all the benefits of the coast and restaurants of the hotel you have chosen, but also visiting historical sites, parks and other beauties of this amazing country, including getting to know the assortment of nearby shopping centers. When transferring to the hotel by bus, the guide Aneksa accompanying us instructed us, green, not yet shelled tourists, something like this:
Adults and children, for nothing in the world
Do not go to Mexico for a walk!
Barons in Mexico, bandits in Mexico,
In Mexico, large troglodytes.
They will bite, beat and offend you
Do not go uncle aunt to Mexico for a walk!
In Mexico, robbers, in Mexico, villains,
There are terrible Barmalei in Mexico!
And that you don’t leave the hotel in the evening, and don’t even step into the city of Cancun, and that at least one tourist is robbed and even killed every day. No bars or discos outside the hotel. I immediately vividly remembered the movie "From Dusk Till Dawn". It is clear that the priority of the company's work is our safety. But my daughter almost cried from what she heard. And so tired from the road, sincerely said:
-Where did you take me? I don't want to be here anymore.
As in any city in the world, if you walk through unfamiliar dark gateways with a wallet in one hand and an iPhone in the other, you can make adventures on your ass on your own.
Tourist areas, including bus routes R1, R2 and R27, shops and modern shopping centers, including in the city of Cancun, we always visited calmly without feeling sidelong suspicious looks from outside. Don't stay late and be vigilant at all times. For example, on buses, count the change, otherwise many local drivers are clearly “bad” in counting. The fare is 12 pesos, which is less than the doral, starting with children from three years old.
Anex tour advertising was also standard: do not buy from anyone except us, insurance will not work, they will deceive you everywhere, the buses are old, the guides are only Spanish-speaking and mostly dumb, they will not bring you back to the hotel. The only thing they said honestly is that they buy all the excursions from the locals themselves, since they do not have their own tour agencies.
On the way to the hotel, we already had a team of like-minded people from four families and, having received from Aneks a price list with a tender offer for excursions with prices, by joint efforts we quickly found more advantageous offers from local tour agencies with Russian guides. I’ll tell you about the most interesting excursions and who to buy them from below.
And now directly about the hotel. There are three separate hotels on a chic, very spacious, well-groomed and green area. The first is the five-star "Pyramid", a central seven-story building in the form of a hollow pyramid. Very beautiful and unusual, with 200 rooms. It hosts colorful show programs, as well as check-in and check-out. The status of vacationers in it: "well, all inclusive", black bracelets, food and drink everywhere. The second is Grant Oasis, also five stars.
Two four-story ships on the ocean in the form of elongated, hollow pyramids inside, numbers 200 each, to the right and left of the center. This is the Grand Oasis plus zone, and one of the same ship, but longer and six floors, located on the front on the right, 500 numbers, it's just Grand Oasis. Building number 4, the fifth and sixth floors belong to the Grand Plus category. Vacationers wear blue bracelets. Status: "just all inclusive", food and drink almost everywhere. And, finally, the Oasis light itself, that is, light. Four stars, purple paper bracelets! . The same huge house - a ship - a pyramid, with 500 numbers, on the left along the front, again empty! inside, that is, all the rooms on the sides and doors open into one huge hall. This is building number 2. You will be accommodated here. Status of vacationers: "no status" or "I'm only looking" or "and who's the last to drink or eat. " This is of course a joke. For four stars, the food here is excellent and varied.
Vacationers with children will not have problems feeding the child. In the morning there is always freshly squeezed orange juice, cocoa, coffee, porridge, pancakes, pancakes, yogurt, omelettes. There are always a lot of fruits, greens, a variety of favorite children's pasta, potatoes, rice, cheese, meat, fish, chicken, tea and much more. Out of 25 food outlets, you can visit nine, two of which have a buffet, out of 27 bars, doors are open for you in ten. During the briefing, they will tell you everything in detail and give you a card, where you can go, and where you will be told “sorry”. They don't lie about queues at restaurants. Approximately 1.600 rooms, an average of two people, that's about 3.000 always hungry tourists. You definitely need to queue in the evening. Of course not! Whoever got up first, that and slippers. Breakfast started at 6.30 am, there were queues for breakfast from 8.30 am. For lunch, which started at 12.30, I saw the queue only once. When it poured heavy rain and drove everyone to the restaurants.
And so, vacationers from North and South America dined on burgers and sandwiches, pouring plenty of beer or cola on them, many without leaving the pool. The rest did not leave the beaches or went on excursions. Dinner started at 6:30 pm and lasted until 10:30 pm. And always until 21.00 there were enough empty tables. Later students - alcoholics came running to refuel before nightly entertainments.
Another privilege of the owners of black and blue, but not purple, bracelets was that from 9.00 to 18.00 they could enjoy the benefits of two more hotels of the Oasis system located on the same coast. In one of them, you can definitely enjoy swimming in the calm expanse of the ocean without waves.
Now what do you need to be prepared for, what is not told in the travel agency.
Ambush first. Check-in at the hotel takes place exactly at 15.
00, not earlier, and you will not be able to immediately after a daily flight fall to your own clean toilet bowl for two weeks and stretch out on a soft bed. You have already been assigned room numbers, they can even be removed, but the keys will still be given at 15.00. Such rules. If you arrive in the morning, then you check in your luggage at the luggage room at the entrance to the main building, get the numbers and go ahead to the briefing with the whole crowd. There you will be told everything and competently explained by Russian administrators, in our case, Natalia and Yaroslav. They will issue a hotel card with all the establishments and send you to free swimming until 15.00. Rest has begun. But it started in jeans and sneakers. We opened our suitcases, changed into summer clothes, and set off for reconnaissance before lunch. Advice. Put a set of shorts, T-shirts, swimming trunks, swimsuits, flip flops for the whole family on top in one suitcase. There is also a towel or bathrobe to create a screen.
If you quickly get your luggage upon arrival, you can easily change clothes for the whole family even at the airport. And now you have merged with the crowd of vacationers, only not yet clothed, but you are allowed everywhere, like a check in ists.
We first went to the ocean, where we actually arrived. This is a wide, kilometer-long beach, almost white sand does not burn your feet at all, as, for example, in Turkey or Egypt in the summer at noon, where you can only move in dashes from shade to shade. Here the sand is soft and comfortable, you immediately want to lie on it. Not sand, but sand.
Ambush number two immediately hit us and we admired ambush number three - this is the wind and the seething ocean. We didn't read the reviews and weren't ready for it. The wind here is always like in Safaga in Egypt, a paradise for kites and windsurfers. Wind from strong to very strong. But during the day it is warm, and not hot. This is a plus! In the evening it was cool from the wind, not only near the ocean. Advice.
At least for children, take a warm jacket or a light windbreaker, even if, according to forecasts, it is +28 every day during the day, and +26 at night.
But the ocean, it is not just worried and seething, it breathes. The wave rolls one by one, with foam and roar, and just swimming, like in Cuba in Varadero in the azure calm expanse of the ocean, will not work either, especially with a child. We immediately rebuilt and sausage with my daughter 11 years old, and sometimes with my wife in the coastal! , only in coastal waves. They were full of bruises and bumps, always a full head and full shorts of sand. During the 14 days of our vacation, the ocean swallowed and sucked in the sand two sun glasses, three swimming goggles, three headscarves, two hair ties, one baseball cap, and almost swallowed the swim shorts, the laces of which I forgot to tie. Miraculously, only sunglasses managed to save by touch.
Everything happens very quickly: a wave beats, a thing is blown away, you cast a farewell glance at it, and the rollback of the wave absorbs everything like an abyss. Advice. No glasses on the eyes and hair, no swimming goggles on the forehead, remove the headscarves, fasten the laces on the shorts. Don't climb with a bad back. There are calmer places on the coast, where the waves are smaller, up to calm. Take bus R1 or R2 to Playa Caracol or Playa Tortugas. There are small public beaches, with paid sunbeds and umbrellas. But we went to the hotel rooms. The coast and the sand are everywhere state-owned, but you can use sun loungers only with a bracelet from a nearby hotel - a lifeguard looks into the floor of the eye. Having shown a little cunning and skill, you slowly get used to the sunbeds and enjoy a good rest. Find a map of the area, it will be easier to navigate. It can be downloaded online. You can take it downstairs in the Pyramid, there are tables of travel agencies, including Anex.
You can opposite the hotel across the road, a little to the left, at the boat station, where there is a boat rental booth in the bay with crocodiles.
And probably the most important piece of advice. Do not try to swim into the depths of the ocean, only along the coast, and nearby. I tried and only added to the treasury of personal failures. Sometimes the waves are very strong, even on the approach they beat against each other and seem to explode with a powerful roar and rise like mountains. And at the shore they are simply demolished. Quieter sometimes. There are even boats with parachutes. It was on such a day that I swam. A few days before, the child and I were bobbing in the waves near the shore, losing things. And some completely unsportsmanlike foreigner swam a little further inland, nothing at all, and calmly swam there. After some time, he screamed help, barely audible because of the roar of the waves. Once again he already yelled help, as soon as he could.
I heard and wanted to rush, but then two rescuers appeared, pulled their fins like a bullet and prepared to rush into the abyss, with life buoys tied to their legs. Quite quickly they pulled him ashore, really frightened and exhausted. But I'm not such a weakling, I'm friends with physical education, although the first sand has already begun to crumble. Every day there were many more cases where vacationers swam out only with the help of lifeguards, and once a swimmer was rescued from a boat. It took me very far. Spectators was a full beach. But that didn't stop me. My swim was already well planned. I completely believed in my strength. Every day I swam in the ocean along the shore, but you can always rest when the wave turned over, or drank, or just tired. I did a simple test. If you are just relaxing in the coastal waves, you are always blown to one side along the coast.
After some time, you can just get lost, being at the beach of another hotel. I swam against the current. And swimming along the strokes of a hundred meters, he actually moved about ten meters, but, all the same, like a diesel engine uphill, he slowly rowed forward. If you are still blown away, then you definitely do not need to try to swim. At that time, I began to swim away from the coast, but also along. And somehow imperceptibly ended up at the distance from where everyone is being rescued. The lifeguard whistled. I waved my hand that everything was fine and rowed to the shore, in a calm, measured crawl. Chatted hard, but everything is under control. Only now the shore is not approaching. Increased speed and felt tired. A little tingling in the chest. I decided to break out on a sprint, and the breath ran out pretty quickly and brought first the right, and then the left leg. Here's where I really screwed up. I rested with a brace in my arms, and immediately lost everything that I had achieved - I was again far in the ocean.
I was scared, but I was very ashamed to shout help. The family was on the shore, and from the side of the shore it seemed that I was just training. And you don't drown. You are just helpless. The rescuer swam himself, without waiting for cries for help.
- Everything is OK?
-Es.
-Help.
-But.
Oh, how I longed for him to save me! The Savior pointed harshly towards the shore and swam forward, knowing the fairway for sure. I trudged along, in a crawl, on my hands, helping myself with my petrified legs with the last of my strength. Hands also began to fail, there was really not enough air. The fright and the absence of Corvalol were very disturbing. And here it is, the desired bottom. Immediately receiving a cuff from the benefactor, I just muttered "sorry. " I was so tired that I could not get up on trembling legs and just dangled in the waves near the shore, washing out the remnants of fear from my shorts. At 50, I'm no longer a sea horse. And even if the former bravery returned, I would not risk it anymore. The ocean is stronger.
Released today, not tomorrow. Of course, he told his wife everything. The verdict is simple - you're an idiot. It was closer to departure. The daughter was no longer allowed into the ocean, away from sin. Yeah, she didn't really freak out. She was more interested in the pool. Although the water in the ocean was clearly warmer than in the right basin. I do not recommend visiting the left one, but more on that below.
The total territory of the hotels is conditionally divided into two parts, each of which has its own large, zigzag-shaped swimming pool with smooth entries for children. We rested and swam in the right. This is the zone of the Pyramid and the Grand Oasis. Only here you are not poured, neither alcoholic nor without. But you can sunbathe on any sunbed of any star rating, even on a hard one, even on a soft one throughout the territory. In addition to wide "Hawaiian beds". And then we sometimes, in the late afternoon, admired the beauty of the ocean, lying on them, and no one drove us. Advice.
The best soft places, where during the day both sun and shade are desired, are directly opposite the exit to the pool from the Pyramid, after the booth with scuba divers and towels, on the left side of a wide round flower bed with a palm tree in the middle. Right by the pool, on your own private island.
On the ocean, the best places are in the depths of the beach, under mushrooms and palm trees. I always got up early, and until 8.00 I took the best places either on the beach or by the pool. In addition to hotel towels, always leave personal items on the sunbeds you have occupied: your towels, children's swimwear, books, empty bags and more. It is almost guaranteed that no one will encroach. And towels sometimes just fly away. By the pool near the palms there are stones to press, and on the shore you can fix it with large plastic clothespins bought in advance. And don't park directly under the coconut trees. I dropped two coconuts. Miraculously, no one was hurt. You definitely can't get rid of the bump.
The territory of the entire complex of hotels is very beautiful and green. Between the "Pyramid" and the pool there is a chic pond with shoals of the most beautiful golden multi-colored fish, ranging in size from a palm to a foot of the fiftieth size. We constantly, after each meal, went to feed them. The spectacle is indescribably bewitching, both for children and adults. Fish meet you on the way, only their heads with open mouths stick out of the clear water. Latecomers, out of breath, swim up from all sides. The feeding process itself is a multi-layered fight of several hundred colored fish with such a splash and noise, as if the water is boiling.
The territory is also inhabited by outlandish peacocks. Children also ran to feed them. They eat straight from their hands. And in the evening they fly onto the wooden beams above the paths, and sit there like chickens on a perch, periodically bombarding the vacationers passing under them.
Jaguanas also often crawl out to bask in the sun, from small lizards to decent-sized brontosaurs. We also fed them. They eat everything: bananas, meat, cheese, and sausage.
Everything that the peacocks and yaguns have not eaten is eaten up by local small rooks, with their tails constantly crooked from the wind.
All this is very interesting for children. Fellow rest said that the animals in the hotel can not be fed. Personally, I didn’t see any special Achtungs, and no one ever drove us, although many fed us.
The hotel has a good English-speaking children's club, and in order to have some alone time, you can give your child at a convenient time for you from 9.00 to 17.00, having previously studied the daily schedule of various activities and choosing the most interesting ones. Everything is fenced and shaded.
Sometimes we saw how cheerful animators entertained vacationers during the day. Like small show programs.
The category of rest in this hotel is "Activity". This is ambush number four.
Activi here in the maximum possible form. That is, American, Mexican, Canadian, Colombian and other youth come here just to drink 24 hours a day. During the day, all this happens in the zone of the left pool. I went there to have a look. They drink everywhere: in open bars, in closed bars, on sun loungers, by the pool, in the pool itself, it seems even under water. Noise, hum, music, yelling, shouting. And at the bar in the pool itself, in the water, hundreds of drinking, eating and screaming individuals of various sexes and nationalities stick out at the same time. They don't leave the pool all day. They drink and, no doubt, pee right there. And this drunken writing area connects to the entire left pool, including the kids area. At night, judging by the smell, buckets of bleach are poured into it. But you don't need to go there. Only for a tour.
But in the evening, all this drunken and screaming mass moves to your building two, and as it turned out later, to building four, to prepare for night drinking in bars.
And here you can no longer hide, do not hide. Or, screams, slamming doors - all this echoes through all the floors, as there are no ceilings between them, one huge buzzing cave. And if after a hot day before dinner you dream of a little quiet lie down in the coolness of your room, you are unlikely to succeed. That is, of course you can lie down, but there is no silence. By eleven o'clock in the evening, the bulk of this crowd flows into the bars. You may fall asleep sweetly, but by two o'clock in the morning the first ghouls crawl from the bars, and the banquet continues. In different ways, with varying noise and success, until five in the morning. It is practically useless to drive, as noise sources are scattered from the first to the fifth floor and along the entire length of the building. And earplugs don't help much. Then you have a sweet dream, not for long, as the sun woke up at 7.15. We need to have breakfast early and go sunbathing.
And then all the normal places on the beaches with your late waking up will be occupied.
We were not lucky at first. I got a room on the third floor next to the central staircase and the elevator, to which all the inhabitants of the ship flocked loudly day and night - at home. The door of the room did not close tightly and had a gap of about two centimeters on top. As it turned out later, the doors are like this almost everywhere: a slot on top, a slot on the bottom, a slot on the side, a door with an arc, a door with a propeller. As if the door is always ajar, to achieve a more effective sound effect. Before going to bed, we caulked these cracks with beach towels, and we are not alone, as if preparing for the invasion of zombies. The balcony of the room overlooked the street, the bay. By the way, the view from the balcony is even very beautiful, as if looking at the sea. There are practically no successful quiet rooms in this building, if only those overlooking the street, closer to the end of the ship, numbers from 60 to 50. An open balcony does not save from noise from inside.
On the street with different intensity, depending on the location of the room, ventilation and air conditioning systems hum and crack. All rooms overlooking the pool are additionally subject to noise from night discos and bars, as well as screams and ora moving between the spill points of the drunken mass.
Then we got lucky. When the hotel was 98 percent full, on the third day of rest, we managed to move to the fourth building, the Grand Oasis zone, away from the disco and cheap bars. It was really quieter here, and at night we jumped much less often. Third floor. The windows faced the street. And the noise of four hefty turbines of air conditioning systems, similar to the noise of an airplane turbine, on the second day of living in this room completely ceased to irritate. It even reminded us of the roar of the ocean. We deliberately opened the balcony door so that against its background we would not hear the screams of drunken freaks. But our joy was short-lived.
On the tenth day of a two-week vacation, an ant-heap of Colombian teenagers settled in the hotel. Previously, Yoshkin the cat, they didn’t seem to be settled, but here they settled something, and in our building too. Well, what about those, let's rage, drink and fight. This is where the most “interesting” began. Those serious young American guys who were noisy before, against their background, were quiet angelic sheep. It was locusts that flew in in the form of children of sixteen - eighteen years old, just torn off from their mother's sissy, breaking free, showing off in front of each other and completely unable to drink. They were blown off their heads. On the first night, together with other, less drunk and older American students, we dispersed them, smeared into the wilderness and not sane at all. They yelled in the corridors, yelled from the balconies, yelled in the rooms. But they quickly lost strength from the amount of alcohol they drank and did not resist at all. By morning, they subsided focally and fell asleep sequentially.
The next morning, the entrance to the Pyramid was blocked from all sides with fences and two guards were posted so that the fun kids would not seep into the VIP hotel.
We are out of luck again. Although many of the vacationers who arrived with us and stayed in the second building in some places could not fall asleep at all. The second corps was in complete occupation. On the second night, chaos began in the room above us: something fell, rattled, moved. I went upstairs. Two bodies fell, the other two, still sane, tried to restore them to a vertical position. My first entry in broken English, like:
- pliz, children, slip, but drink, etc. They are:
- Sorry, friend.
Hugs, handshakes. Let's break up friends. Three minutes later, everything repeats itself, with renewed vigor. By the amount of noise, reinforcements arrived in time for them. My daughter jumps from the roar.
The second entry, not a single English word, standard Russian slang without pauses, a fire extinguisher in the hands and calmly at the end:
-five, pho, free, tu.
At the word that, everyone scattered to their beds, without continuing. I'll file a patent. They didn't mess with us anymore. But the bodies crawling in the morning fell again and dropped something. Every evening, before going to the bars, half-drunk creatures gathered on the floors at the beginning of the corridors near the stairs, and after some time they gradually went to attack. From two o'clock in the morning they were already drunk as an insole and basically all the insane entities crawled back, and at the same points near the stairs they began a noisy divorce for beds. Apparently, someone remembered the number of his room, and this was noted by loud screams and hooting. Sometimes the buglers pulled up and blew something like:
- Sleep, sleep, on the wards!
- To the Octoberists and the guys!
But the guys didn't budge.
That's when I had to help. After unpacking the carefully caulked door, I approached these giggling teenagers with the words:
- Dear gentlemen, if you don't mind, would you be so kind as to do me a favor and get out of here quickly. Well, or almost so. Gentlemen surprisingly did not bully, and sometimes even began to creep noisily. But by three or four in the morning, new intoxicated shelves were being pulled up to the divorce points. And it all started from the beginning. I already regretted that we moved to another building. We were the only Russians here. I fought an unequal battle with evil spirits alone, without the support of my compatriots occupied in the second corps. Well, at least one of the imported families came to my aid! And I was heard. By this time, my diplomatic forces were completely exhausted.
Having stepped out onto the battlefield again and with difficulty keeping my raging wife in the room, I began to politely yell from the threshold of my door that they say please shut up. But the parasites had already developed immunity to me, and they stopped taking me seriously. To all these screams, a sleepy strong dark-skinned friend came out of the room opposite. He obviously also wanted a quiet slip. I spread my arms and pointed towards the savages. He nodded at me and punched me in the palm. Note that I didn't suggest this. We approached from two sides, along parallel corridors, towards a violent crowd of teenagers who, for some reason, were especially distraught today. Even the stormy speech of the American fighting friend did not have any effect, insults clearly rained down with the frequent use of the letter f. Then slaps, pushes, cracks, pokes, cuffs were used. At least two middle fingers were curled up and thrown out in our direction.
It already looked like a conflict, with more and more participants from both sides. Drunk girls were screaming, my wife scolded someone, not particularly choosing a word, nevertheless rushing to my aid. Rolling up their sleeves and using foul language, the Russians who had arisen from somewhere went on the attack. The situation was clearly out of control. Helped my new iron comrade fire extinguisher. A greasy stream of powder mass instantly extinguished the flames of war. Just in time, the guards arrived, temporarily stopping the protection of VIP zones and the nightly catching drunken bodies from the pool, and people in black with badges on their jackets, obviously representatives of the administration. At the very beginning of the negotiations, I heard the words "la policia". Inadequate youth blew away like the wind. Apparently their excessive activity was caused not only by the use of alcohol.
A very swollen crowd of sleepless and restless vacationers, led by my wife, entered into negotiations with the administration and finally told her in all international languages what we think about this "wonderful" vacation in their "wonderful" hotel. And since there were no victims, nothing was broken, the fire extinguisher was hung in place, and the remains of the foam were quickly removed by the attendants, the representatives of the authorities had no choice but to apologize and assure everyone that they would not allow such disgrace on the part of young people, not only in VIP zones, but also in our, unguarded, "sleeping" buildings. Of course, we “believed” and, quickly celebrating the victory, the parties dispersed. But the drunk schoolchildren above us continued to fall quietly and drop something. But it was only lulling. The next day, the students became incredibly polite.
When we moved to another room in the fourth building, we almost ended up in a suite and lived like people: we sat on chairs in front of a round table, drank tea with sugar and coffee with cream prepared in a coffee machine from a tea set. An iron on an ironing board was used to iron crumpled things that had been stale in suitcases. Surprisingly, there was a hair dryer in all rooms.
Eighth ambush. There is a safe in every room, but the lock with the key to it is paid, only 7 dorals per day. So either I carry everything with me, or 100 dorals of additional expenses in 14 days.
And finally, in my opinion, the last, ninth ambush is the absence of what we are all so accustomed to in all places of our vacation - free Wi-Fi Internet. Pay here and you're online throughout the hotel. There are many payment options. One of them is 30 dorals for 5 days per device. That is, for two weeks another 100 bucks.
Advice. Opposite the hotel, a little to the left across the road, there is an Okso store.
Next to it there is also a currency exchange at the normal rate - we had 17.8 pesos for a doral, not like in a hotel - 16.7 pesos for a doral. There is a pharmacy nearby. In Oxus, you can purchase a local telephone card without presenting documents. It's called a chip card. For 327 pesos, which is less than 20 dorals, you get the opportunity to make calls in Mexico - you can call representatives of a travel agency, and one and a half gigabytes of Internet. There are also cheaper ones with fewer bytes. I inserted the card into my main phone and, without any re-registration, used my WhatsApp, as well as the Internet everywhere, not only at the hotel. But the most interesting thing is that I forgot to set limits on the use of mobile data, and by the last days of rest I had gone beyond the limit of one and a half gigs allotted to me. But now it's 1700 MB, and everything works.
To speak, and to the point, will be all the time without stopping. This also includes a visit to a tequila factory with a tasting of the product. Another good shop where you can buy a beautiful hammock for your country residence. Very comfortable and colorful. We haven't seen these for sale anywhere else. Bargain. Buy all souvenirs in Chichen Itza. Trade hard. Moreover, you will be there in the late afternoon, when the shopkeepers are already starting to fold.
The second 100-pound excursion for the whole family is a visit to the Xplor park. Here you are your own masters, you don't need a guide. You will independently swim both on rafts and in vests along warm underground rivers with stalactites and stalagmites, drive a Jeep Safari through the jungle, fly dozens of cable cars over the jungle with a breeze and just have an interesting walk.
At your service is a bar with all kinds of freshly squeezed juices in unlimited quantities, as well as a five-star huge restaurant in the jungle under the roof of the all-inclusive system and everything is delicious. The territory of the park is perfectly groomed, the ways of movement are thought out. You arrived, registered through the general queue, received license plate helmets with chips and keys to the safes and off you go. There is only one road so far, to the central Heart. I’ll clarify right away that there are chips in helmets to identify photos with you. Everywhere, on all tracks, you will be automatically photographed. Smile always. There are plenty of places with manual photos. They approached, pressed the big red button, and a bird flew out. Again they pressed, they pressed, they pressed ....And already a flock of birds. The number of photos is unlimited. Then you download all the photos from the site, according to your code, it is assigned when paying. You can pay either before or after. For three, about 80 dorals.
First of all, we changed into shorts and swimsuits, put things in the safes and to the Heart. You can take a phone in an anti-water case for flights and races, but you can always run to the safe for it. The order of the program is arbitrary, queues, if any, are fast. Advice. Before races, swims and flights, quickly refresh yourself in a restaurant, otherwise you may not have enough strength. At the end, there will be time for a quiet lunch. Refreshed, now stomp either to the Heart, or follow the signs to the start of the nearest track. All signs are in English, but almost immediately everything is clear.
For families with children, I recommend visiting the Xcaret park, excursion plus with lunch. It contains flora and fauna from all over Mexico. Plus, you will visit beautiful beaches, underground rivers, colorful shows.
We simply did not have enough money for the rest, no less interesting excursions. Even at the most reasonable prices, we spent more than a thousand American dorals on three excursions.
Briefly about the shops that you can visit.
La Isla, brand store, 10 minutes on any bus towards the city. Buses run every minute. Everything is expensive, but according to the wife, it is cheaper than in Moscow, and things are different.
Chedraui, products with boutiques like Auchan. We bought souvenirs. The nearest one is 20 minutes by any bus towards the city, to the Playa Caracol stop. Can be combined with a trip to the beach.
Walmart, clothes, in the city itself, bus R2.50 minutes.
And finally, the largest one is Plaza Las Americas. Everything is collected. In the town. To get about an hour only by bus R2-27. To have time to get around at least a solid part of it, it is better to go immediately after breakfast. My wife studied the shops, and the child and I quietly moaned:
- Well, who builds like that?
And then we left after lunch. Leave no later than 20.00. Bus R 27 runs every 20 minutes during the day and once an hour in the evening.
In general, dear friends tourists! You decide. You can safely go only to the Oazil Grand Plus or to the Pyramid.
And then with some risk of being awakened by a cheerful crowd of noisy foreign children walking under your windows. But even this is still better than spending your vacation in the recreation areas of Russian youth, who can only communicate in deviant slang, regardless of their alcoholic state.
One, perhaps, the main wish of the hotel administration: Give the second building completely for the dressing of young people. But the fourth is for family vacationers, especially with children. It will be possible to immediately return the furniture to the rooms of this building - no one else will break it. All other inconveniences are either accidental or solvable. And believe me, the rating of your hotel will immediately go into the positive zone. But, as I managed to see, on the American continents your hotel is already scandalously popular, and a handful of Russian tourists will not make you feel better.
I want to say a huge thank you to the Russian staff of the hotel, Natalia and Yaroslav, who always came to the rescue in difficult and controversial situations, and did not disregard any request of every vacationer from our environment. And we have always been sympathetic to the fact that the solution of some issues was really beyond their power.
Regards and good luck to everyone!
Lomov Igor
March 05.2018
But there is another side of the coin: clean, well-groomed and beautiful territory, nature, greenery, coconut palms, gentle warm sun, livestock, cozy restaurants and good food, live ocean, good beach, comfortable and large swimming pool, excellent service, friendly and helpful staff and a lot of other positive things - all this well-being makes your stay at the hotel almost heavenly.
And if you still decide to spend your well-deserved vacation in this “easy” hotel, I would like to share with you my personal impressions and some subtleties of this, believe me, a multifaceted and unforgettable vacation in its own way. I will not impose my opinion on you, but just want to help you make the right choice.
This hotel is both beautiful and terrible!
And if you do not have nostalgia for the noisy, cheerful and, undoubtedly, interesting student life in a hostel, especially at night, and you dream of an expensive, beautiful, calm, family vacation on the shores of the azure smooth surface of the gentle ocean, then this place is not for you! My wife and daughters and I had a great rest in February 2018, but sometimes we had to refine a lot and make our vacation unforgettable ourselves. All you have to do is prepare a little, avoid a few ambushes, and accept some things as inevitable...
But there is one very suspiciously profitable offer from the tour operator Aneks tour, to the Oasis Light hotel. We were immediately warned that it would be noisy and fun. We didn't know then how much. We thought that, as always, we would ask for a quiet room and enjoy an unforgettable vacation. Moreover, a letter was sent from the travel agency to Anex Tour with a request for a remote, quiet room for a family with a child.
I'll get ahead of myself - no one saw the letter at the hotel. Having issued all the necessary documents, we went to a paradise on earth.
The flight was operated by Azur Air. The whole journey from home to the hotel took exactly 24 hours, taking into account Moscow traffic jams and a sixteen-hour flight with landing for refueling at Punta Cana Airport in the Dominican Republic. About flights there and back, you can write a separate story. But in principle, nothing terrible. Just a little cramped. Very long-legged and full for this flight, the road is closed. You will definitely have to fork out for a more expensive tour operator and air carrier. The rest in cramped but not offended. The seats are narrow, the distance between the rows is minimized. The plane is ideal for transporting 360 pioneers to the health camp. Personally, I periodically became numb, and part of the way back and forth, along with other sufferers, flew standing at emergency exits.
There were very few handrails, like in the subway or bus
For a flight to Mexico, Azur Air provides a Boeing 767-300, with a 2-4-2 lineup. There is an online check-in at Domodedovo Airport, from where the airline's flights depart. Starts in 24 hours. It is better to go to the Azura website in advance, get comfortable and stretch your fingers. Because from the first minute of registration, places fly like hot cakes. Two hours after the start of registration, you can no longer sit next to a family of three in the first, second, or even third salons. And when you receive the documents, check the availability of ticket numbers. There were several separated families on the plane who were not assigned these numbers. They registered only at the airport for the remaining seats. Then they walked around the plane and searched in vain for someone to change with. And no one changes, because almost everyone is flying with their families. There is no online check-in at Cancun airport on the way back.
And at Domodedovo airport, also on the way back, there is no "pipe" for Azur Air. Tested on three flights. We took off at plus 30 and arrived at minus 20. For some time, the plane turned into a huge dressing room in order to have time to change clothes before meeting the harsh reality and slide down the icy ramp into a cold bus.
The very trip to Mexico initially implies not only enjoying all the benefits of the coast and restaurants of the hotel you have chosen, but also visiting historical sites, parks and other beauties of this amazing country, including getting to know the assortment of nearby shopping centers. When transferring to the hotel by bus, the guide Aneksa accompanying us instructed us, green, not yet shelled tourists, something like this:
Adults and children, for nothing in the world
Do not go to Mexico for a walk!
Barons in Mexico, bandits in Mexico,
In Mexico, large troglodytes.
They will bite, beat and offend you
Do not go uncle aunt to Mexico for a walk!
In Mexico, robbers, in Mexico, villains,
There are terrible Barmalei in Mexico!
And that you don’t leave the hotel in the evening, and don’t even step into the city of Cancun, and that at least one tourist is robbed and even killed every day. No bars or discos outside the hotel. I immediately vividly remembered the movie "From Dusk Till Dawn". It is clear that the priority of the company's work is our safety. But my daughter almost cried from what she heard. And so tired from the road, sincerely said:
-Where did you take me? I don't want to be here anymore.
As in any city in the world, if you walk through unfamiliar dark gateways with a wallet in one hand and an iPhone in the other, you can make adventures on your ass on your own.
Tourist areas, including bus routes R1, R2 and R27, shops and modern shopping centers, including in the city of Cancun, we always visited calmly without feeling sidelong suspicious looks from outside. Don't stay late and be vigilant at all times. For example, on buses, count the change, otherwise many local drivers are clearly “bad” in counting. The fare is 12 pesos, which is less than the doral, starting with children from three years old.
Anex tour advertising was also standard: do not buy from anyone except us, insurance will not work, they will deceive you everywhere, the buses are old, the guides are only Spanish-speaking and mostly dumb, they will not bring you back to the hotel. The only thing they said honestly is that they buy all the excursions from the locals themselves, since they do not have their own tour agencies.
On the way to the hotel, we already had a team of like-minded people from four families and, having received from Aneks a price list with a tender offer for excursions with prices, by joint efforts we quickly found more advantageous offers from local tour agencies with Russian guides. I’ll tell you about the most interesting excursions and who to buy them from below.
And now directly about the hotel. There are three separate hotels on a chic, very spacious, well-groomed and green area. The first is the five-star "Pyramid", a central seven-story building in the form of a hollow pyramid. Very beautiful and unusual, with 200 rooms. It hosts colorful show programs, as well as check-in and check-out. The status of vacationers in it: "well, all inclusive", black bracelets, food and drink everywhere. The second is Grant Oasis, also five stars.
Two four-story ships on the ocean in the form of elongated, hollow pyramids inside, numbers 200 each, to the right and left of the center. This is the Grand Oasis plus zone, and one of the same ship, but longer and six floors, located on the front on the right, 500 numbers, it's just Grand Oasis. Building number 4, the fifth and sixth floors belong to the Grand Plus category. Vacationers wear blue bracelets. Status: "just all inclusive", food and drink almost everywhere. And, finally, the Oasis light itself, that is, light. Four stars, purple paper bracelets! . The same huge house - a ship - a pyramid, with 500 numbers, on the left along the front, again empty! inside, that is, all the rooms on the sides and doors open into one huge hall. This is building number 2. You will be accommodated here. Status of vacationers: "no status" or "I'm only looking" or "and who's the last to drink or eat. " This is of course a joke. For four stars, the food here is excellent and varied.
Vacationers with children will not have problems feeding the child. In the morning there is always freshly squeezed orange juice, cocoa, coffee, porridge, pancakes, pancakes, yogurt, omelettes. There are always a lot of fruits, greens, a variety of favorite children's pasta, potatoes, rice, cheese, meat, fish, chicken, tea and much more. Out of 25 food outlets, you can visit nine, two of which have a buffet, out of 27 bars, doors are open for you in ten. During the briefing, they will tell you everything in detail and give you a card, where you can go, and where you will be told “sorry”. They don't lie about queues at restaurants. Approximately 1.600 rooms, an average of two people, that's about 3.000 always hungry tourists. You definitely need to queue in the evening. Of course not! Whoever got up first, that and slippers. Breakfast started at 6.30 am, there were queues for breakfast from 8.30 am. For lunch, which started at 12.30, I saw the queue only once. When it poured heavy rain and drove everyone to the restaurants.
And so, vacationers from North and South America dined on burgers and sandwiches, pouring plenty of beer or cola on them, many without leaving the pool. The rest did not leave the beaches or went on excursions. Dinner started at 6:30 pm and lasted until 10:30 pm. And always until 21.00 there were enough empty tables. Later students - alcoholics came running to refuel before nightly entertainments.
Another privilege of the owners of black and blue, but not purple, bracelets was that from 9.00 to 18.00 they could enjoy the benefits of two more hotels of the Oasis system located on the same coast. In one of them, you can definitely enjoy swimming in the calm expanse of the ocean without waves.
Now what do you need to be prepared for, what is not told in the travel agency.
Ambush first. Check-in at the hotel takes place exactly at 15.
00, not earlier, and you will not be able to immediately after a daily flight fall to your own clean toilet bowl for two weeks and stretch out on a soft bed. You have already been assigned room numbers, they can even be removed, but the keys will still be given at 15.00. Such rules. If you arrive in the morning, then you check in your luggage at the luggage room at the entrance to the main building, get the numbers and go ahead to the briefing with the whole crowd. There you will be told everything and competently explained by Russian administrators, in our case, Natalia and Yaroslav. They will issue a hotel card with all the establishments and send you to free swimming until 15.00. Rest has begun. But it started in jeans and sneakers. We opened our suitcases, changed into summer clothes, and set off for reconnaissance before lunch. Advice. Put a set of shorts, T-shirts, swimming trunks, swimsuits, flip flops for the whole family on top in one suitcase. There is also a towel or bathrobe to create a screen.
If you quickly get your luggage upon arrival, you can easily change clothes for the whole family even at the airport. And now you have merged with the crowd of vacationers, only not yet clothed, but you are allowed everywhere, like a check in ists.
We first went to the ocean, where we actually arrived. This is a wide, kilometer-long beach, almost white sand does not burn your feet at all, as, for example, in Turkey or Egypt in the summer at noon, where you can only move in dashes from shade to shade. Here the sand is soft and comfortable, you immediately want to lie on it. Not sand, but sand.
Ambush number two immediately hit us and we admired ambush number three - this is the wind and the seething ocean. We didn't read the reviews and weren't ready for it. The wind here is always like in Safaga in Egypt, a paradise for kites and windsurfers. Wind from strong to very strong. But during the day it is warm, and not hot. This is a plus! In the evening it was cool from the wind, not only near the ocean. Advice.
At least for children, take a warm jacket or a light windbreaker, even if, according to forecasts, it is +28 every day during the day, and +26 at night.
But the ocean, it is not just worried and seething, it breathes. The wave rolls one by one, with foam and roar, and just swimming, like in Cuba in Varadero in the azure calm expanse of the ocean, will not work either, especially with a child. We immediately rebuilt and sausage with my daughter 11 years old, and sometimes with my wife in the coastal! , only in coastal waves. They were full of bruises and bumps, always a full head and full shorts of sand. During the 14 days of our vacation, the ocean swallowed and sucked in the sand two sun glasses, three swimming goggles, three headscarves, two hair ties, one baseball cap, and almost swallowed the swim shorts, the laces of which I forgot to tie. Miraculously, only sunglasses managed to save by touch.
Everything happens very quickly: a wave beats, a thing is blown away, you cast a farewell glance at it, and the rollback of the wave absorbs everything like an abyss. Advice. No glasses on the eyes and hair, no swimming goggles on the forehead, remove the headscarves, fasten the laces on the shorts. Don't climb with a bad back. There are calmer places on the coast, where the waves are smaller, up to calm. Take bus R1 or R2 to Playa Caracol or Playa Tortugas. There are small public beaches, with paid sunbeds and umbrellas. But we went to the hotel rooms. The coast and the sand are everywhere state-owned, but you can use sun loungers only with a bracelet from a nearby hotel - a lifeguard looks into the floor of the eye. Having shown a little cunning and skill, you slowly get used to the sunbeds and enjoy a good rest. Find a map of the area, it will be easier to navigate. It can be downloaded online. You can take it downstairs in the Pyramid, there are tables of travel agencies, including Anex.
You can opposite the hotel across the road, a little to the left, at the boat station, where there is a boat rental booth in the bay with crocodiles.
And probably the most important piece of advice. Do not try to swim into the depths of the ocean, only along the coast, and nearby. I tried and only added to the treasury of personal failures. Sometimes the waves are very strong, even on the approach they beat against each other and seem to explode with a powerful roar and rise like mountains. And at the shore they are simply demolished. Quieter sometimes. There are even boats with parachutes. It was on such a day that I swam. A few days before, the child and I were bobbing in the waves near the shore, losing things. And some completely unsportsmanlike foreigner swam a little further inland, nothing at all, and calmly swam there. After some time, he screamed help, barely audible because of the roar of the waves. Once again he already yelled help, as soon as he could.
I heard and wanted to rush, but then two rescuers appeared, pulled their fins like a bullet and prepared to rush into the abyss, with life buoys tied to their legs. Quite quickly they pulled him ashore, really frightened and exhausted. But I'm not such a weakling, I'm friends with physical education, although the first sand has already begun to crumble. Every day there were many more cases where vacationers swam out only with the help of lifeguards, and once a swimmer was rescued from a boat. It took me very far. Spectators was a full beach. But that didn't stop me. My swim was already well planned. I completely believed in my strength. Every day I swam in the ocean along the shore, but you can always rest when the wave turned over, or drank, or just tired. I did a simple test. If you are just relaxing in the coastal waves, you are always blown to one side along the coast.
After some time, you can just get lost, being at the beach of another hotel. I swam against the current. And swimming along the strokes of a hundred meters, he actually moved about ten meters, but, all the same, like a diesel engine uphill, he slowly rowed forward. If you are still blown away, then you definitely do not need to try to swim. At that time, I began to swim away from the coast, but also along. And somehow imperceptibly ended up at the distance from where everyone is being rescued. The lifeguard whistled. I waved my hand that everything was fine and rowed to the shore, in a calm, measured crawl. Chatted hard, but everything is under control. Only now the shore is not approaching. Increased speed and felt tired. A little tingling in the chest. I decided to break out on a sprint, and the breath ran out pretty quickly and brought first the right, and then the left leg. Here's where I really screwed up. I rested with a brace in my arms, and immediately lost everything that I had achieved - I was again far in the ocean.
I was scared, but I was very ashamed to shout help. The family was on the shore, and from the side of the shore it seemed that I was just training. And you don't drown. You are just helpless. The rescuer swam himself, without waiting for cries for help.
- Everything is OK?
-Es.
-Help.
-But.
Oh, how I longed for him to save me! The Savior pointed harshly towards the shore and swam forward, knowing the fairway for sure. I trudged along, in a crawl, on my hands, helping myself with my petrified legs with the last of my strength. Hands also began to fail, there was really not enough air. The fright and the absence of Corvalol were very disturbing. And here it is, the desired bottom. Immediately receiving a cuff from the benefactor, I just muttered "sorry. " I was so tired that I could not get up on trembling legs and just dangled in the waves near the shore, washing out the remnants of fear from my shorts. At 50, I'm no longer a sea horse. And even if the former bravery returned, I would not risk it anymore. The ocean is stronger.
Released today, not tomorrow. Of course, he told his wife everything. The verdict is simple - you're an idiot. It was closer to departure. The daughter was no longer allowed into the ocean, away from sin. Yeah, she didn't really freak out. She was more interested in the pool. Although the water in the ocean was clearly warmer than in the right basin. I do not recommend visiting the left one, but more on that below.
The total territory of the hotels is conditionally divided into two parts, each of which has its own large, zigzag-shaped swimming pool with smooth entries for children. We rested and swam in the right. This is the zone of the Pyramid and the Grand Oasis. Only here you are not poured, neither alcoholic nor without. But you can sunbathe on any sunbed of any star rating, even on a hard one, even on a soft one throughout the territory. In addition to wide "Hawaiian beds". And then we sometimes, in the late afternoon, admired the beauty of the ocean, lying on them, and no one drove us. Advice.
The best soft places, where during the day both sun and shade are desired, are directly opposite the exit to the pool from the Pyramid, after the booth with scuba divers and towels, on the left side of a wide round flower bed with a palm tree in the middle. Right by the pool, on your own private island.
On the ocean, the best places are in the depths of the beach, under mushrooms and palm trees. I always got up early, and until 8.00 I took the best places either on the beach or by the pool. In addition to hotel towels, always leave personal items on the sunbeds you have occupied: your towels, children's swimwear, books, empty bags and more. It is almost guaranteed that no one will encroach. And towels sometimes just fly away. By the pool near the palms there are stones to press, and on the shore you can fix it with large plastic clothespins bought in advance. And don't park directly under the coconut trees. I dropped two coconuts. Miraculously, no one was hurt. You definitely can't get rid of the bump.
The territory of the entire complex of hotels is very beautiful and green. Between the "Pyramid" and the pool there is a chic pond with shoals of the most beautiful golden multi-colored fish, ranging in size from a palm to a foot of the fiftieth size. We constantly, after each meal, went to feed them. The spectacle is indescribably bewitching, both for children and adults. Fish meet you on the way, only their heads with open mouths stick out of the clear water. Latecomers, out of breath, swim up from all sides. The feeding process itself is a multi-layered fight of several hundred colored fish with such a splash and noise, as if the water is boiling.
The territory is also inhabited by outlandish peacocks. Children also ran to feed them. They eat straight from their hands. And in the evening they fly onto the wooden beams above the paths, and sit there like chickens on a perch, periodically bombarding the vacationers passing under them.
Jaguanas also often crawl out to bask in the sun, from small lizards to decent-sized brontosaurs. We also fed them. They eat everything: bananas, meat, cheese, and sausage.
Everything that the peacocks and yaguns have not eaten is eaten up by local small rooks, with their tails constantly crooked from the wind.
All this is very interesting for children. Fellow rest said that the animals in the hotel can not be fed. Personally, I didn’t see any special Achtungs, and no one ever drove us, although many fed us.
The hotel has a good English-speaking children's club, and in order to have some alone time, you can give your child at a convenient time for you from 9.00 to 17.00, having previously studied the daily schedule of various activities and choosing the most interesting ones. Everything is fenced and shaded.
Sometimes we saw how cheerful animators entertained vacationers during the day. Like small show programs.
The category of rest in this hotel is "Activity". This is ambush number four.
Activi here in the maximum possible form. That is, American, Mexican, Canadian, Colombian and other youth come here just to drink 24 hours a day. During the day, all this happens in the zone of the left pool. I went there to have a look. They drink everywhere: in open bars, in closed bars, on sun loungers, by the pool, in the pool itself, it seems even under water. Noise, hum, music, yelling, shouting. And at the bar in the pool itself, in the water, hundreds of drinking, eating and screaming individuals of various sexes and nationalities stick out at the same time. They don't leave the pool all day. They drink and, no doubt, pee right there. And this drunken writing area connects to the entire left pool, including the kids area. At night, judging by the smell, buckets of bleach are poured into it. But you don't need to go there. Only for a tour.
But in the evening, all this drunken and screaming mass moves to your building two, and as it turned out later, to building four, to prepare for night drinking in bars.
And here you can no longer hide, do not hide. Or, screams, slamming doors - all this echoes through all the floors, as there are no ceilings between them, one huge buzzing cave. And if after a hot day before dinner you dream of a little quiet lie down in the coolness of your room, you are unlikely to succeed. That is, of course you can lie down, but there is no silence. By eleven o'clock in the evening, the bulk of this crowd flows into the bars. You may fall asleep sweetly, but by two o'clock in the morning the first ghouls crawl from the bars, and the banquet continues. In different ways, with varying noise and success, until five in the morning. It is practically useless to drive, as noise sources are scattered from the first to the fifth floor and along the entire length of the building. And earplugs don't help much. Then you have a sweet dream, not for long, as the sun woke up at 7.15. We need to have breakfast early and go sunbathing.
And then all the normal places on the beaches with your late waking up will be occupied.
We were not lucky at first. I got a room on the third floor next to the central staircase and the elevator, to which all the inhabitants of the ship flocked loudly day and night - at home. The door of the room did not close tightly and had a gap of about two centimeters on top. As it turned out later, the doors are like this almost everywhere: a slot on top, a slot on the bottom, a slot on the side, a door with an arc, a door with a propeller. As if the door is always ajar, to achieve a more effective sound effect. Before going to bed, we caulked these cracks with beach towels, and we are not alone, as if preparing for the invasion of zombies. The balcony of the room overlooked the street, the bay. By the way, the view from the balcony is even very beautiful, as if looking at the sea. There are practically no successful quiet rooms in this building, if only those overlooking the street, closer to the end of the ship, numbers from 60 to 50. An open balcony does not save from noise from inside.
On the street with different intensity, depending on the location of the room, ventilation and air conditioning systems hum and crack. All rooms overlooking the pool are additionally subject to noise from night discos and bars, as well as screams and ora moving between the spill points of the drunken mass.
Then we got lucky. When the hotel was 98 percent full, on the third day of rest, we managed to move to the fourth building, the Grand Oasis zone, away from the disco and cheap bars. It was really quieter here, and at night we jumped much less often. Third floor. The windows faced the street. And the noise of four hefty turbines of air conditioning systems, similar to the noise of an airplane turbine, on the second day of living in this room completely ceased to irritate. It even reminded us of the roar of the ocean. We deliberately opened the balcony door so that against its background we would not hear the screams of drunken freaks. But our joy was short-lived.
On the tenth day of a two-week vacation, an ant-heap of Colombian teenagers settled in the hotel. Previously, Yoshkin the cat, they didn’t seem to be settled, but here they settled something, and in our building too. Well, what about those, let's rage, drink and fight. This is where the most “interesting” began. Those serious young American guys who were noisy before, against their background, were quiet angelic sheep. It was locusts that flew in in the form of children of sixteen - eighteen years old, just torn off from their mother's sissy, breaking free, showing off in front of each other and completely unable to drink. They were blown off their heads. On the first night, together with other, less drunk and older American students, we dispersed them, smeared into the wilderness and not sane at all. They yelled in the corridors, yelled from the balconies, yelled in the rooms. But they quickly lost strength from the amount of alcohol they drank and did not resist at all. By morning, they subsided focally and fell asleep sequentially.
The next morning, the entrance to the Pyramid was blocked from all sides with fences and two guards were posted so that the fun kids would not seep into the VIP hotel.
We are out of luck again. Although many of the vacationers who arrived with us and stayed in the second building in some places could not fall asleep at all. The second corps was in complete occupation. On the second night, chaos began in the room above us: something fell, rattled, moved. I went upstairs. Two bodies fell, the other two, still sane, tried to restore them to a vertical position. My first entry in broken English, like:
- pliz, children, slip, but drink, etc. They are:
- Sorry, friend.
Hugs, handshakes. Let's break up friends. Three minutes later, everything repeats itself, with renewed vigor. By the amount of noise, reinforcements arrived in time for them. My daughter jumps from the roar.
The second entry, not a single English word, standard Russian slang without pauses, a fire extinguisher in the hands and calmly at the end:
-five, pho, free, tu.
At the word that, everyone scattered to their beds, without continuing. I'll file a patent. They didn't mess with us anymore. But the bodies crawling in the morning fell again and dropped something. Every evening, before going to the bars, half-drunk creatures gathered on the floors at the beginning of the corridors near the stairs, and after some time they gradually went to attack. From two o'clock in the morning they were already drunk as an insole and basically all the insane entities crawled back, and at the same points near the stairs they began a noisy divorce for beds. Apparently, someone remembered the number of his room, and this was noted by loud screams and hooting. Sometimes the buglers pulled up and blew something like:
- Sleep, sleep, on the wards!
- To the Octoberists and the guys!
But the guys didn't budge.
That's when I had to help. After unpacking the carefully caulked door, I approached these giggling teenagers with the words:
- Dear gentlemen, if you don't mind, would you be so kind as to do me a favor and get out of here quickly. Well, or almost so. Gentlemen surprisingly did not bully, and sometimes even began to creep noisily. But by three or four in the morning, new intoxicated shelves were being pulled up to the divorce points. And it all started from the beginning. I already regretted that we moved to another building. We were the only Russians here. I fought an unequal battle with evil spirits alone, without the support of my compatriots occupied in the second corps. Well, at least one of the imported families came to my aid! And I was heard. By this time, my diplomatic forces were completely exhausted.
Having stepped out onto the battlefield again and with difficulty keeping my raging wife in the room, I began to politely yell from the threshold of my door that they say please shut up. But the parasites had already developed immunity to me, and they stopped taking me seriously. To all these screams, a sleepy strong dark-skinned friend came out of the room opposite. He obviously also wanted a quiet slip. I spread my arms and pointed towards the savages. He nodded at me and punched me in the palm. Note that I didn't suggest this. We approached from two sides, along parallel corridors, towards a violent crowd of teenagers who, for some reason, were especially distraught today. Even the stormy speech of the American fighting friend did not have any effect, insults clearly rained down with the frequent use of the letter f. Then slaps, pushes, cracks, pokes, cuffs were used. At least two middle fingers were curled up and thrown out in our direction.
It already looked like a conflict, with more and more participants from both sides. Drunk girls were screaming, my wife scolded someone, not particularly choosing a word, nevertheless rushing to my aid. Rolling up their sleeves and using foul language, the Russians who had arisen from somewhere went on the attack. The situation was clearly out of control. Helped my new iron comrade fire extinguisher. A greasy stream of powder mass instantly extinguished the flames of war. Just in time, the guards arrived, temporarily stopping the protection of VIP zones and the nightly catching drunken bodies from the pool, and people in black with badges on their jackets, obviously representatives of the administration. At the very beginning of the negotiations, I heard the words "la policia". Inadequate youth blew away like the wind. Apparently their excessive activity was caused not only by the use of alcohol.
A very swollen crowd of sleepless and restless vacationers, led by my wife, entered into negotiations with the administration and finally told her in all international languages what we think about this "wonderful" vacation in their "wonderful" hotel. And since there were no victims, nothing was broken, the fire extinguisher was hung in place, and the remains of the foam were quickly removed by the attendants, the representatives of the authorities had no choice but to apologize and assure everyone that they would not allow such disgrace on the part of young people, not only in VIP zones, but also in our, unguarded, "sleeping" buildings. Of course, we “believed” and, quickly celebrating the victory, the parties dispersed. But the drunk schoolchildren above us continued to fall quietly and drop something. But it was only lulling. The next day, the students became incredibly polite.
When we moved to another room in the fourth building, we almost ended up in a suite and lived like people: we sat on chairs in front of a round table, drank tea with sugar and coffee with cream prepared in a coffee machine from a tea set. An iron on an ironing board was used to iron crumpled things that had been stale in suitcases. Surprisingly, there was a hair dryer in all rooms.
Eighth ambush. There is a safe in every room, but the lock with the key to it is paid, only 7 dorals per day. So either I carry everything with me, or 100 dorals of additional expenses in 14 days.
And finally, in my opinion, the last, ninth ambush is the absence of what we are all so accustomed to in all places of our vacation - free Wi-Fi Internet. Pay here and you're online throughout the hotel. There are many payment options. One of them is 30 dorals for 5 days per device. That is, for two weeks another 100 bucks.
Advice. Opposite the hotel, a little to the left across the road, there is an Okso store.
Next to it there is also a currency exchange at the normal rate - we had 17.8 pesos for a doral, not like in a hotel - 16.7 pesos for a doral. There is a pharmacy nearby. In Oxus, you can purchase a local telephone card without presenting documents. It's called a chip card. For 327 pesos, which is less than 20 dorals, you get the opportunity to make calls in Mexico - you can call representatives of a travel agency, and one and a half gigabytes of Internet. There are also cheaper ones with fewer bytes. I inserted the card into my main phone and, without any re-registration, used my WhatsApp, as well as the Internet everywhere, not only at the hotel. But the most interesting thing is that I forgot to set limits on the use of mobile data, and by the last days of rest I had gone beyond the limit of one and a half gigs allotted to me. But now it's 1700 MB, and everything works.
To speak, and to the point, will be all the time without stopping. This also includes a visit to a tequila factory with a tasting of the product. Another good shop where you can buy a beautiful hammock for your country residence. Very comfortable and colorful. We haven't seen these for sale anywhere else. Bargain. Buy all souvenirs in Chichen Itza. Trade hard. Moreover, you will be there in the late afternoon, when the shopkeepers are already starting to fold.
The second 100-pound excursion for the whole family is a visit to the Xplor park. Here you are your own masters, you don't need a guide. You will independently swim both on rafts and in vests along warm underground rivers with stalactites and stalagmites, drive a Jeep Safari through the jungle, fly dozens of cable cars over the jungle with a breeze and just have an interesting walk.
At your service is a bar with all kinds of freshly squeezed juices in unlimited quantities, as well as a five-star huge restaurant in the jungle under the roof of the all-inclusive system and everything is delicious. The territory of the park is perfectly groomed, the ways of movement are thought out. You arrived, registered through the general queue, received license plate helmets with chips and keys to the safes and off you go. There is only one road so far, to the central Heart. I’ll clarify right away that there are chips in helmets to identify photos with you. Everywhere, on all tracks, you will be automatically photographed. Smile always. There are plenty of places with manual photos. They approached, pressed the big red button, and a bird flew out. Again they pressed, they pressed, they pressed ....And already a flock of birds. The number of photos is unlimited. Then you download all the photos from the site, according to your code, it is assigned when paying. You can pay either before or after. For three, about 80 dorals.
First of all, we changed into shorts and swimsuits, put things in the safes and to the Heart. You can take a phone in an anti-water case for flights and races, but you can always run to the safe for it. The order of the program is arbitrary, queues, if any, are fast. Advice. Before races, swims and flights, quickly refresh yourself in a restaurant, otherwise you may not have enough strength. At the end, there will be time for a quiet lunch. Refreshed, now stomp either to the Heart, or follow the signs to the start of the nearest track. All signs are in English, but almost immediately everything is clear.
For families with children, I recommend visiting the Xcaret park, excursion plus with lunch. It contains flora and fauna from all over Mexico. Plus, you will visit beautiful beaches, underground rivers, colorful shows.
We simply did not have enough money for the rest, no less interesting excursions. Even at the most reasonable prices, we spent more than a thousand American dorals on three excursions.
Briefly about the shops that you can visit.
La Isla, brand store, 10 minutes on any bus towards the city. Buses run every minute. Everything is expensive, but according to the wife, it is cheaper than in Moscow, and things are different.
Chedraui, products with boutiques like Auchan. We bought souvenirs. The nearest one is 20 minutes by any bus towards the city, to the Playa Caracol stop. Can be combined with a trip to the beach.
Walmart, clothes, in the city itself, bus R2.50 minutes.
And finally, the largest one is Plaza Las Americas. Everything is collected. In the town. To get about an hour only by bus R2-27. To have time to get around at least a solid part of it, it is better to go immediately after breakfast. My wife studied the shops, and the child and I quietly moaned:
- Well, who builds like that?
And then we left after lunch. Leave no later than 20.00. Bus R 27 runs every 20 minutes during the day and once an hour in the evening.
In general, dear friends tourists! You decide. You can safely go only to the Oazil Grand Plus or to the Pyramid.
And then with some risk of being awakened by a cheerful crowd of noisy foreign children walking under your windows. But even this is still better than spending your vacation in the recreation areas of Russian youth, who can only communicate in deviant slang, regardless of their alcoholic state.
One, perhaps, the main wish of the hotel administration: Give the second building completely for the dressing of young people. But the fourth is for family vacationers, especially with children. It will be possible to immediately return the furniture to the rooms of this building - no one else will break it. All other inconveniences are either accidental or solvable. And believe me, the rating of your hotel will immediately go into the positive zone. But, as I managed to see, on the American continents your hotel is already scandalously popular, and a handful of Russian tourists will not make you feel better.
I want to say a huge thank you to the Russian staff of the hotel, Natalia and Yaroslav, who always came to the rescue in difficult and controversial situations, and did not disregard any request of every vacationer from our environment. And we have always been sympathetic to the fact that the solution of some issues was really beyond their power.
Regards and good luck to everyone!
Lomov Igor
March 05.2018
Translated automatically from Russian. View original
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