Пятью звездами и не пахнет! Five stars and does not smell!

Good afternoon, dear tourists. I present a full review of the wonderful hotel "Garden Resort". I will give your attention a full report on my unforgettable vacation, and you yourself decide to visit such a wonderful place in Kemer or not! In the evening we flew in with a friend and her mother. We were at the hotel around 12 noon. And then it began ..."Sorry, we have no places" (the only apology from the manager for all the time), they told us at the reception in broken English, warning that they did not know this language at all, and with each of our statements and appeals to they were told the same phrase: "I dont understand you! " Just so that they would not experience severe inconvenience on such an "ironic" night, they offered us to sleep in a hotel that is literally behind the wall of Gardena, "in a ruble".

Why do I go to Turkey, pay money for 7 nights in the "five" and have to spend one night in a hotel with 3 stars, where, by the way, right at the reception, ten centimeter centipedes crawl on the floor?!?

No, thank you my friends, spend the night there yourself!! ! Very rudely, like with pigs, the hotel manager tried to prove to us that we are not people, we cannot enter into their position, because they had "technical problems" with this room. And why should we, tourists, solve your technical problems ?? ? Well, it's okay, we say that we just want to look at the room, at our room, what happened there that we can't spend the night?? ? They don’t let us in, they say the pipe burst, after half an hour they say that there is a fire. Funny.

As a result, the Turkish ANIMATOR offers our mother to hook up with some grandmother for the night, and take me and my friend to the Aura club, well, like I’ll sing you a beer there for free and bring you back by 7 in the morning, otherwise we want to relax from the plane , wash and sleep - no one cares!! ! What nonsense! And by that time it was already 2am!
The hotel manager actually went to his closet and said that he didn’t want to talk to us (he was offended, bunny), what annoyance he usually fell on the “suckers”, but then the hard-nosed and arrogant Russians got caught! After 10 minutes, a girl named Irishka from Nikolaev comes up to us (Hello, dear! ) Brings us beer and juice, at least somehow tries to calm us down, then throughout the rest we were practically inseparable! Then a sleepy girl (a Russian from St. Petersburg) comes down and asks what happened, why they bring a cot into her "standard" and want to put some woman in? Naturally, we refuse such an absurd offer and say that if they do not immediately move us to at least a hotel of the same level, we will call our travel agency! Then the Turks ran in, fussed, started calling somewhere. While we were already dialing the number and for some reason the phone at the reception once - and turned off. Probably again "technical problems".

As a result, by half past four in the morning, their animator takes us to the ultra all-inclusive "Orange County" hotel. Super hotel, super service! For one night. And by 9 in the morning we return to this hell, to meet our "best friend for the week" hotel guide, a representative of the wonderful company Tez-tour! I won’t tell you for a long time how she took the side of the Turks and defended their interests, based on empty words, as if we were rude and rude to them! With grief in half we are settled, and as compensation, they give not our standard, but a family room, with a wonderful view of the roof of the dining room with a hood. The room was fragrant with fried butter SO much that it immediately caused a gag reflex! Driven to hysteria, we descend again and, with tears in our eyes from anger, ask if these people are friends with their heads at all? Why do they mock us so, let them give us a standard, we don't need compensation.
The manager writes a receipt stating that TOMORROW we will choose the room that we like, on the condition that we write that we have no claims against the hotel and our WONDERFUL tour operator! We agree to everything already, because 2 out of 7 days are simply lost, spoiled and overshadowed! Only two days later we settled into a room with a normal smell and view! But, with a broken split system and no light in the bathroom!
Now about the most beautiful beach. No comments here! There is NO beach! Awnings and deck chairs - this is all that vacationers have to be content with! Disgusting bar 10 meters from the sea, where there is practically nothing and a terrible descent!

Very funny and terribly smart people work in this hotel!!!
The hotel is really "All Inclusive": your attention is provided with the erotic services of an animator (in principle, he does not offer anything else, although if my memory serves me, the animator should entertain people, and not pester them) and a porter who offers to kiss him in the elevator , at the reception, upon request to connect with the hairdresser, they give you a printout with a schedule for breakfast, lunch and dinner!

Greatest animation!! ! Animators, mostly sleeping with the rest by the pool, unique 2 discs with 10 tracks, the sounds of which we enjoyed all week, I will never forget, the memory simply will not allow it!

I could write five more sheets about my unforgettable impressions of this hotel, but there is simply no desire to have anything in common with this viper! Although there were good impressions from this unforgettable place!
Relatively clean rooms, quite tasty food, but the smell in the dining room left much to be desired! Sufficiently large and clean pool.