Умирающий санаторий dying sanatorium

We were in the sanatorium from 07/24/18 to 08/04/18.
What can I say: I have been to Odessa several times before for work, and each time, passing through the city, I paid attention to the sanatoriums located along the route of the tram or minibus in which I was. The same thing always attracted attention: people were moving behind the fence, who, judging by their posture and manner of moving, were very calm and submissive. "Morlocks" from the series "Lapsi" came to mind.
And now we are here: me, wife and son 13 years old. Knowing about the peculiarities of rest in Ukrainian sanatoriums from last year's experience of staying in Mirgorod (san. "Poltava"), we decided to fork out and ordered a "Lux" room on the website of the sanatorium - Gorky's dacha, 2nd floor with a sea view. For three paid about 3500 hryvnia. per day. The first surprise was expected upon arrival at the sanatorium - the second floor is already occupied, sorry... They gave me a two-room suite on the first floor. On the first night, a beach cover was stolen from us, which we hung on the balcony for the night to dry, on the 2nd, the clothespins were removed. Odessa Mama! The fact that our TV did not work, it turned out later, by the way, it was never repaired, I had to remind about it 3 times, but the result was only that a master arrived a week later and found out that “you don’t have a satellite dish. ” Visually, there were satellite dishes on the case, the cable was laid to the tuner, but....In the end, I had to go to the reception and demand a refund, which did not work right away, since the first response of the duty registrar was: - Why do you need a TV? I had to explain that the use of TV is included in the cost of using the room, after which they observed some movement, negotiations for half an hour, and finally we were paid 600 UAH.

But that's not the point. The fact is that in this, as in many other sanatoriums in Odessa (this is how the coastal and adjacent territory is arranged), it is necessary to go down to the sea. There is a staircase of about 130 steps, along which you go down, and also go back up the same way. I must say that it’s not very pleasant to do this in the sun at the height of a sunny day... It’s a pity for the elderly, among whom there were quite a few with chopsticks. Every few flights, of course, there are benches where you can take a breath under the scorching sun... In general, I never considered it difficult for myself to climb the stairs to my 8th floor if the elevator was not working, but so far my attitude towards the stairs has changed a lot . Is it really impossible to build a lift that will lift everyone for a moderate fee?
Now let's talk about treatment. We got to the doctor without any problems, after spending only 35-40 minutes in line in the corridor among screaming and frolicking children clearly under 4 years old, although the description of the sanatorium clearly states that children under 4 years old are not accepted. By the way, closer to our departure, a significant number of parents appeared with strollers in which babies were crying. ?? ? - to the management of the sanatorium.
Doctor Ismailova made a good impression with her knowledge, promptly and completely free of charge prescribed the necessary and possible procedures. However, the procedures themselves, and most likely, the equipment for dispensing them, do not meet modern requirements. So speleotherapy was advised by the doctor herself, because, according to her, this is not what you expect. Medicinal herbal decoctions - we were all prescribed a sedative collection No. 3, which includes motherwort and hops did not have a completely bitter aftertaste, which is characteristic of these herbs. How many times do you dilute it? Pearl baths were a regular chipped bath, into which plastic tubes with holes were lowered. When you lie down in it, your body displaces them so that the bubbles go sideways and past... My bath was coniferous... But the needles should have a specific “coniferous” aroma... Well, there was none, no matter how you sniffed, really, that liquid has a beautiful emerald color that poured into the bath was. The visit to the aroma-psychotherapy session was especially funny - Well, as expected, they put an apparatus in the middle of a large room that sprayed essential oil into the room, and then it began! We expected that calming, relaxing music would turn on, but instead we turned on a recording of some old man who reassured us in a nasal voice, saying that as a result of the session, productive working capacity would be restored (I still can’t understand how it is? Maybe there is unproductive working capacity I ask everyone until I figured it out... ). At the end of the session, he wished us good night... But it was only 11-30 !! ! Not to mention the fact that for the duration of such events, the room in which it takes place is closed so that people can safely go through this session. Here, the nurse, who should keep order, did not react at all to the walking of vacationers back and forth. Of course, we didn't go there anymore. Approximately the same can be said about electrical procedures.
Now about the dining room. As residents of the suite, we used the “small” hall. The food is plentiful, the choice is 3-4 first and second courses, elements of the buffet - the choice of 3-4 salads, as much as you want, coffee or tea... Everything is fine, very attentive, polite waiters, but there is one thing about food . A serving consists of a very large amount of garnish and a small piece of chicken, usually with broken bones. It is very beneficial, because no one can eat so much porridge, and then it can be handed over to feed pigs at the nearest farm. The same probably applies to salads... The only "plus" is dumplings with potatoes, which my son really liked. In the small hall there is also a “service room”, which I managed to look into once because of the sluggishness of the waiters. There is a luxurious sofa, rectangularly covering the common dining table, at which visiting directors and acquaintances of the director of the sanatorium (according to our waiters) ate food. They walked past us every day, and the dishes they were served naturally differed from ours, you know which way you know… By the way, they lived on the second floor of Gorky’s dacha, perhaps just in our room…

What can you say about the beach? Municipal beach, changing rooms approximately every 500 m, 200 meters from the shore, there is a breakwater under water, on which you can swim and stand on it, admiring the underwater inhabitants and the view of the coast. One day, standing on it, I noticed a bunch of... feces approaching me.
What can I say, we returned home, I went to visit my father, walking around the yard, I saw him sitting on a bench in the yard, soon our familiar neighbor came out: - “Oh, hello! Did your father say that you were in Odessa? I was there, in 1968. Has it already been cleaned and put in order? ” Then there was a story about how, while swimming in the Lanzheron area, he got into the feces that were in the sea due to a broken sewer.
You see, there is a saying: when you sit down to play with a card sharper, you make only one mistake - you take the cards in your hands. Now, having returned home, and, having looked at the offers of tour operators, for example, regarding a holiday in Turkey, we came to the conclusion that during the same days we could have a rest in a 5-star hotel. And this is taking into account air travel, ultra-all inclusive, etc.
Draw your own conclusions! As long as our sanatoriums are managed by people like Malykhina, who, by the way, is also a local deputy, it will probably be so. There will be the same unswept territory, there will be a pump room with no information about the composition of the water, there will be bathtubs in some of which a rubber foot mat is used instead of a cork (I personally had to use it... ). And there will be “Morlocks”, who, I am sure, in response to my such a lengthy review, will send their angry and indignant protesters...